fuck you, july.
i can assume that this happens to everyone or i'm just the odd one out. you know that month in your life that's consistently shit? where everything terrible happens, seemingly almost all at once? for me, that's july.
it's actually a shame. july is that first time in toronto where summer is in full swing. school is done. the majority of people have found employment. it's hot and bothersome. several friends celebrate birthdays during this month. things are generally meant to be wholesome. things shouldn't go wrong. and yet, they always do.
in 2011, i got laid off from a job i liked. i was scrambling to find another. i quit another job to get more hours at the job i ended up getting laid off from. i was stuck living at home, without a job. my current relationship was dwindling and heading away from all things great. i was unhappy. i wanted to move to toronto already and have a fresh start. i needed to get away.
in 2012, things ended with a dude and it hurt. i had no job and no income. i was struggling to pay rent and live in toronto. i was stuck interviewing for jobs i didn't want, at wages i didn't care for, and still wasn't getting anywhere. i lost close friends. my friends went through challenges of their own and i felt awful for not being able to help them.
in typical july fashion, 2013 has been no different. i have no job. i have no income. i'm not dating anyone. i can barely afford to have a roof over my head. i've lost friends. i'm at a standstill on what to do. i don't want to leave toronto, but at the same time, i might need to do that if i can get a job, have an income, and start a new life some place else. things get fucked up around here and it's usually my own fault.
i've never had a full time job or full time income. i've been in school for the past 7 years. everything i've done has been school-related or seasonal. i don't have experiences in long-term employment or long-term dating. there are countless people in my life that shouldn't be in my life at all because i know they are holding me back. as i grow up, it's getting easier to let people and things go.
i needed things to be different but everything is still the same.
Showing posts with label birthday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label birthday. Show all posts
Jul 18, 2013
Oct 8, 2012
sometimes things get, complicated
where do i start?
1. the job hunt solution
it seems like i had been coordinating an interview time with the home depot for about a month. it was constant phone tag and problems with scheduling because apparently, people don't listen to me when i tell them that i'm busy. eventually, they called me with a time that worked on the thursday for the following tuesday. on the friday, i confirmed and asked for a confirmation callback just to make sure i knew what i was getting myself into. by the time tuesday rolled around, i still hadn't heard from them on a confirmation and i was worried.
with the help of some opinions from friends, i decided to show up to the supposed interview regardless of the confirmation call. it didn't help that i was feeling terrible with a cold and i didn't want to go; but i went. as i commuted to the home depot, i realized that i was in familiar territory. besides a recent encounter with a dude that set me up with a walk of shame from mid-town, there was something else about this area that seemed too ridiculously familiar. and then i walked by a place i had an interview with back in early summer: the school uniform place. it took all my might not to walk my ass in there and see if anyone in the store remembered who i was. that's just the sort of mood i was in that particular evening on the way to my interview.
i walked into the home depot and talked to somebody about how i'm there for an interview but i wasn't sure exactly who i was supposed to interview with. eventually, it gets sorted and i meet with a store manager. he asks some pretty detailed questions about projects and my experience but i was confident in my responses. i knew what i was talking about -- i guess that project management background was starting to pay off. the position was for a project coordinator that, when i was applying for the position, was part-time. this part-time idea was confirmed with the HR manager upon my successful passing of the pre-screen interview. but the store manager told me differently -- that he wanted someone flexible enough to work a 40+ hour work week if it should arise. well, fuck. i left the interview feeling useless.
by thursday afternoon, i receive a call from the HR manager again asking me to meet with her friday afternoon to discuss and consider positions. i was intrigued and she had basically refused to answer my questions over the phone. so, friday afternoon, after the longest commute ever from school, i met up with her. she verbally offered me a position at the special services desk looking after customer projects and things like that. she said she could also cross-train me on project coordination as the two departments coincide with each other and work as a cross-functional team most of the time. i was stoked on this offer and filled in the paperwork immediately. upon the completion and passing of a back check and reference check, as well as getting a go ahead from headquarters (as they're creating a new position for me to set up wages and so on), i would be hired.
so now i wait for a call on wednesday to possibly start on friday. there you have it, after being unemployed for 1 year and 2 months, i may have a job. it's about fucking time.
2. the internship promotion
remember that longboarding internship i had been working through over the past summer? the one that i was doing a crazy amount of work for without being paid (but at least getting some recognition for it, and having fun while i was doing it... most times)?
well, i had been working on a marketing/promotions project for about 2 months since the beginning of august, monitoring the progress of online advertisements and customer inquiries/sales. the thing was, there were no inquiries or sales. so i spent the majority of the project not doing anything and awaiting a response. last week, i received a response and sent it over. it was the first time in 2 months that i had heard an update from my 'boss', who had been MIA since i met with him at the beginning of august to work on this project. apparently, he had been very ill and took some time off. but he didn't tell me any of this.
i met with him and he told me how appreciative he is with all of the effort and enthusiasm i've put into my projects. and he wanted me to move up as an intern. essentially, he now wants me to help him make projects for the other interns and he wants me to supervise and train new interns. i was pretty stoked on this because i really enjoy managing people and well, developing projects. i'm all about conflict resolution and coming up with alternatives and recommendations on how to do things in a different way, which is probably why project management was such a good fit for me. besides my excellent organizational and time management skills -- geez.
3. the birthday, the school, and the other internship
i turned 24 years old on saturday october 6. my celebrations started on friday after my ridiculous day of class, commuting, the home depot interview, more commuting, and the longboarding internship. i met up with friends for dinner and drinks and was passed out on my couch before midnight. yes, i was drunk, but also exhausted. it was well worth it. because canadian thanksgiving fell on the same weekend as my birthday, most friends headed home or had family things to attend. i didn't want to get in the way of that. my birthday almost always falls on thanksgiving every year. leave it to my parents to have 2 kids with birthdays that fall on holidays. i'm having a part next weekend to celebrate my birthday and i can't wait for that.
i spent my actual birthday day with much needed amber time and a couple surprises from friends. i had an early night and awaited the arrival of my parents the next day. on october 7, my parents came to visit me in toronto. they brought me a bunch of shit and helped clean up the apartment. i took them out for a nice hike through riverdale farm and had dinner and drinks at house on parliament. i was happy to see them.
i'm pretty swamped with school most of the time but i'm content with what's happening. i'm waiting to start my internship with metrolinx but i don't know exactly what's going on with that or what to expect. i've finished a few papers and presentations so far that keep me busy and i also took on hip hop and zumba classes for a few weeks (although i didn't go last week since i was sick... boooo.)
starting next week, i'm managing school, 2 internships, and a part-time job. so if you need me or want to do something, make sure to book me a year in advance.
1. the job hunt solution
it seems like i had been coordinating an interview time with the home depot for about a month. it was constant phone tag and problems with scheduling because apparently, people don't listen to me when i tell them that i'm busy. eventually, they called me with a time that worked on the thursday for the following tuesday. on the friday, i confirmed and asked for a confirmation callback just to make sure i knew what i was getting myself into. by the time tuesday rolled around, i still hadn't heard from them on a confirmation and i was worried.
with the help of some opinions from friends, i decided to show up to the supposed interview regardless of the confirmation call. it didn't help that i was feeling terrible with a cold and i didn't want to go; but i went. as i commuted to the home depot, i realized that i was in familiar territory. besides a recent encounter with a dude that set me up with a walk of shame from mid-town, there was something else about this area that seemed too ridiculously familiar. and then i walked by a place i had an interview with back in early summer: the school uniform place. it took all my might not to walk my ass in there and see if anyone in the store remembered who i was. that's just the sort of mood i was in that particular evening on the way to my interview.
i walked into the home depot and talked to somebody about how i'm there for an interview but i wasn't sure exactly who i was supposed to interview with. eventually, it gets sorted and i meet with a store manager. he asks some pretty detailed questions about projects and my experience but i was confident in my responses. i knew what i was talking about -- i guess that project management background was starting to pay off. the position was for a project coordinator that, when i was applying for the position, was part-time. this part-time idea was confirmed with the HR manager upon my successful passing of the pre-screen interview. but the store manager told me differently -- that he wanted someone flexible enough to work a 40+ hour work week if it should arise. well, fuck. i left the interview feeling useless.
by thursday afternoon, i receive a call from the HR manager again asking me to meet with her friday afternoon to discuss and consider positions. i was intrigued and she had basically refused to answer my questions over the phone. so, friday afternoon, after the longest commute ever from school, i met up with her. she verbally offered me a position at the special services desk looking after customer projects and things like that. she said she could also cross-train me on project coordination as the two departments coincide with each other and work as a cross-functional team most of the time. i was stoked on this offer and filled in the paperwork immediately. upon the completion and passing of a back check and reference check, as well as getting a go ahead from headquarters (as they're creating a new position for me to set up wages and so on), i would be hired.
so now i wait for a call on wednesday to possibly start on friday. there you have it, after being unemployed for 1 year and 2 months, i may have a job. it's about fucking time.
2. the internship promotion
remember that longboarding internship i had been working through over the past summer? the one that i was doing a crazy amount of work for without being paid (but at least getting some recognition for it, and having fun while i was doing it... most times)?
well, i had been working on a marketing/promotions project for about 2 months since the beginning of august, monitoring the progress of online advertisements and customer inquiries/sales. the thing was, there were no inquiries or sales. so i spent the majority of the project not doing anything and awaiting a response. last week, i received a response and sent it over. it was the first time in 2 months that i had heard an update from my 'boss', who had been MIA since i met with him at the beginning of august to work on this project. apparently, he had been very ill and took some time off. but he didn't tell me any of this.
i met with him and he told me how appreciative he is with all of the effort and enthusiasm i've put into my projects. and he wanted me to move up as an intern. essentially, he now wants me to help him make projects for the other interns and he wants me to supervise and train new interns. i was pretty stoked on this because i really enjoy managing people and well, developing projects. i'm all about conflict resolution and coming up with alternatives and recommendations on how to do things in a different way, which is probably why project management was such a good fit for me. besides my excellent organizational and time management skills -- geez.
3. the birthday, the school, and the other internship
i turned 24 years old on saturday october 6. my celebrations started on friday after my ridiculous day of class, commuting, the home depot interview, more commuting, and the longboarding internship. i met up with friends for dinner and drinks and was passed out on my couch before midnight. yes, i was drunk, but also exhausted. it was well worth it. because canadian thanksgiving fell on the same weekend as my birthday, most friends headed home or had family things to attend. i didn't want to get in the way of that. my birthday almost always falls on thanksgiving every year. leave it to my parents to have 2 kids with birthdays that fall on holidays. i'm having a part next weekend to celebrate my birthday and i can't wait for that.
i spent my actual birthday day with much needed amber time and a couple surprises from friends. i had an early night and awaited the arrival of my parents the next day. on october 7, my parents came to visit me in toronto. they brought me a bunch of shit and helped clean up the apartment. i took them out for a nice hike through riverdale farm and had dinner and drinks at house on parliament. i was happy to see them.
i'm pretty swamped with school most of the time but i'm content with what's happening. i'm waiting to start my internship with metrolinx but i don't know exactly what's going on with that or what to expect. i've finished a few papers and presentations so far that keep me busy and i also took on hip hop and zumba classes for a few weeks (although i didn't go last week since i was sick... boooo.)
starting next week, i'm managing school, 2 internships, and a part-time job. so if you need me or want to do something, make sure to book me a year in advance.
Oct 11, 2011
MIA
you may have noticed a lack of blog updates the past 2 weeks.
never fear, i am still alive and kickin'. things have just been so busy. i'm not even sure if busy is the right word here.
i went out for samson's birthday dinner on september 29th at kokoni. the sushi was great. too bad i was starving before i got there and had to grab a sub. it felt weird to be the only girl.. and the only straight person. it had been a very long time since the last time i noticed that conundrum. the 30th, i wrote my second assignment -- an internal memo. we had a meeting with the program coordinator to discuss things about the internship. these meetings will be every couple of weeks now. i'm looking forward to securing a placement and getting the experience of actually doing something outside of class and theory. i went to samson's party for a little bit then came home to do some work for the week ahead.
october 1st, i went with heather in the afternoon to wal-mart (ugh) to help her buy glasses. i stopped in at toys r' us looking for the possibility of really cool halo lego like i saw in sears (again, ugh) way back when but found nothing cool. instead, i came across fable 3 for 15 bucks. yeah, i just HAD to get it. we met up later for my first nuit blache experience. i saw lots of people throughout the night and a number of different pieces of artwork. only like 3 of them were really interesting. it was a cold night and eventually we stopped for late-night breakfast. i managed to stay out until almost 5am. i don't think i would ever go to nuit blanche again.
october 2nd, i rested up during the day and wrote my proposal for environmental law that wasn't for marks. we also had an open book quiz set for october 3... also, not for marks. i didn't understand the logic behind any of this no grades stuff.
october 4th, steph came up, i began my first day of skipping class, and my first day volunteering for the greenbuild conference. we went to check out the green job fair early but it wasn't what we thought it was going to be, so we hung out doing nothing for awhile until our volunteer shift started at 2pm. we worked one of the speaker series doing crowd control, crowd control for the opening plenary, and had an hour on a recycling station. we headed to east side marios for some dinner and home to unwind.
october 5th, we were up bright and early to catch speakers at 8:30am. i saw one about green schools that teach and another on sustainable campus planning/ecodistricts. all superb. we got our free lunch (meh, wasn't that great) and started our second volunteer shift at 2:30pm; recycling stations for 4 hours. the time just dragged. eventually, we got to leave sometime after 6pm. we received free tickets to the speakers/maroon 5 concert at ACC that evening, but i didn't feel much like going, needed to study for my quiz the next day, and steph had to go home. i gave the tickets to bobby and his friend instead. they had a good time, i hope.
october 6th was my 23rd birthday, though it didn't feel like it for most of the day. i went to another speaker series; one about climate change plans for university of bc and calgary and one about re-skinning and sustainable buildings. again, they were fantastic. i grabbed my free lunch (much better this time) and came home to shower and study. however, there was no water in my building. so i was a smelly birthday girl. i went to class and was greeted with happy birthdays (which made it feel like my birthday again), wrote the quiz, stuck around for lecture, then met up with steve to go to my birthday dinner festivities at joeys eaton centre. it was nice to see everyone and get free dessert. steve, heather, and i went out after for more drinks. it was a good and bad idea.
i made it home and passed out only to awake again after 6am and knew for sure i would be late to class. that is, if the ttc would have cooperated normally. there were super long delays and then i had to change trains at sheppard because there was something wrong with the train i was on. eventually, i made it to class, wrote what i thought would be the shittiest 'bad news' letter and got my memo back from last week -- 100%! i met up with my group after class to discuss our project due the tuesday after thanksgiving weekend. originally, i had planned to take the 3pm bus home to niagara falls. i decided to wait it out and take the 7:30pm bus, except it was so busy that it was close to 8:30pm before i even got on a bus.
it was nice to see the parents over the weekend and eat lots of turkey. the weekend was definitely not long enough. my parents drove me back monday afternoon (while i snagged the 42" tv which looks amazing in our living room) with a stop at ball's falls for their thanksgiving festival and to see the conservation centre. i was back on the grind this morning at 6am for class at 8am.
i've been saving up for an amazing blog post in the works that will soon be ready for publishing. so, don't feel bad if you don't find my daily life to be that exciting.
never fear, i am still alive and kickin'. things have just been so busy. i'm not even sure if busy is the right word here.
i went out for samson's birthday dinner on september 29th at kokoni. the sushi was great. too bad i was starving before i got there and had to grab a sub. it felt weird to be the only girl.. and the only straight person. it had been a very long time since the last time i noticed that conundrum. the 30th, i wrote my second assignment -- an internal memo. we had a meeting with the program coordinator to discuss things about the internship. these meetings will be every couple of weeks now. i'm looking forward to securing a placement and getting the experience of actually doing something outside of class and theory. i went to samson's party for a little bit then came home to do some work for the week ahead.
october 1st, i went with heather in the afternoon to wal-mart (ugh) to help her buy glasses. i stopped in at toys r' us looking for the possibility of really cool halo lego like i saw in sears (again, ugh) way back when but found nothing cool. instead, i came across fable 3 for 15 bucks. yeah, i just HAD to get it. we met up later for my first nuit blache experience. i saw lots of people throughout the night and a number of different pieces of artwork. only like 3 of them were really interesting. it was a cold night and eventually we stopped for late-night breakfast. i managed to stay out until almost 5am. i don't think i would ever go to nuit blanche again.
october 2nd, i rested up during the day and wrote my proposal for environmental law that wasn't for marks. we also had an open book quiz set for october 3... also, not for marks. i didn't understand the logic behind any of this no grades stuff.
october 4th, steph came up, i began my first day of skipping class, and my first day volunteering for the greenbuild conference. we went to check out the green job fair early but it wasn't what we thought it was going to be, so we hung out doing nothing for awhile until our volunteer shift started at 2pm. we worked one of the speaker series doing crowd control, crowd control for the opening plenary, and had an hour on a recycling station. we headed to east side marios for some dinner and home to unwind.
october 5th, we were up bright and early to catch speakers at 8:30am. i saw one about green schools that teach and another on sustainable campus planning/ecodistricts. all superb. we got our free lunch (meh, wasn't that great) and started our second volunteer shift at 2:30pm; recycling stations for 4 hours. the time just dragged. eventually, we got to leave sometime after 6pm. we received free tickets to the speakers/maroon 5 concert at ACC that evening, but i didn't feel much like going, needed to study for my quiz the next day, and steph had to go home. i gave the tickets to bobby and his friend instead. they had a good time, i hope.
october 6th was my 23rd birthday, though it didn't feel like it for most of the day. i went to another speaker series; one about climate change plans for university of bc and calgary and one about re-skinning and sustainable buildings. again, they were fantastic. i grabbed my free lunch (much better this time) and came home to shower and study. however, there was no water in my building. so i was a smelly birthday girl. i went to class and was greeted with happy birthdays (which made it feel like my birthday again), wrote the quiz, stuck around for lecture, then met up with steve to go to my birthday dinner festivities at joeys eaton centre. it was nice to see everyone and get free dessert. steve, heather, and i went out after for more drinks. it was a good and bad idea.
i made it home and passed out only to awake again after 6am and knew for sure i would be late to class. that is, if the ttc would have cooperated normally. there were super long delays and then i had to change trains at sheppard because there was something wrong with the train i was on. eventually, i made it to class, wrote what i thought would be the shittiest 'bad news' letter and got my memo back from last week -- 100%! i met up with my group after class to discuss our project due the tuesday after thanksgiving weekend. originally, i had planned to take the 3pm bus home to niagara falls. i decided to wait it out and take the 7:30pm bus, except it was so busy that it was close to 8:30pm before i even got on a bus.
it was nice to see the parents over the weekend and eat lots of turkey. the weekend was definitely not long enough. my parents drove me back monday afternoon (while i snagged the 42" tv which looks amazing in our living room) with a stop at ball's falls for their thanksgiving festival and to see the conservation centre. i was back on the grind this morning at 6am for class at 8am.
i've been saving up for an amazing blog post in the works that will soon be ready for publishing. so, don't feel bad if you don't find my daily life to be that exciting.
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