i like to think of acceptance as both good and really terrible. why? i'm glad you asked.
i've been doing a lot of 'accepting' in 2012 so far. for instance, i accepted that i had a cold and i beat it down until i felt better with natural remedies. then, i was fine for almost a week until my body decided to play a cruel joke on me and make me feel six thousand times worse than i actually did before. and when i didn't accept the fact that i haven't felt that bad since i was about 7 years old, it got worse. much worse. i had to accept that i needed help, went to the walk-in clinic, and healed myself through antibiotics that i'm currently finishing up tomorrow.
from this terrible sickness, i had to accept that i would be falling behind in schoolwork. i was able to make up the quizzes/assignments i missed with no problem (but there's no telling if i did well on them). i was surprised at the amount i had missed in one short week -- when i only have class 3 days a week. yes, i sacrificed 4 days a week of school for scheduling of 5 classes in 3 days. which also means i'm stuck at school for a glorious 14 hours on wednesdays and thursdays. in turn, i spend a ton of money during these days trying to feed myself (eating on campus is costly) and by the time i get home around 8pm, i'm exhausted and don't want to cook, so i spend more money on a little dinner. but i've accepted 2 days a week of spending into an unemployed grad student budget.
i began to accept that my apartment renovations will never be finished. there was a time, briefly, when renovations took place 5 days a week, monday to friday. the drilling, hammering, painting, dust, and overall noise from these renovations was driving me crazy and made it extremely difficult to concentrate (or for the better part of january, get some rest to get over a sickness). it's saturday today, and this morning i was rudely awoken by the loud sounds of hammering above or below me at 9am. it's now almost 4pm and the hammering and drilling have yet to stop. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?! do your fucking renovations on weekdays and leave my weekends free of the noise! ugh. i wish i had the ability to block out noise and sleep through anything.
i've accepted the fact that too many of my plans involve (and are dependent on) drinking in some way. this became evident while being on those antibiotics and i wasn't able to go out and drink, so i just didn't go out at all. this isn't necessarily a bad thing; i just never realized it before.
i suppose the good news here is that i was accepted to seneca's post-grad green business management program for september 2012. but there's no telling what will happen in between now and when i have to accept the offer. i could get offered a sweet as job doing something cool. or, y'know, still be an unemployed bum.
we'll see how i go about accepting things in the near future.
