acceptance

i like to think of acceptance as both good and really terrible. why? i'm glad you asked.

i've been doing a lot of 'accepting' in 2012 so far. for instance, i accepted that i had a cold and i beat it down until i felt better with natural remedies. then, i was fine for almost a week until my body decided to play a cruel joke on me and make me feel six thousand times worse than i actually did before. and when i didn't accept the fact that i haven't felt that bad since i was about 7 years old, it got worse. much worse. i had to accept that i needed help, went to the walk-in clinic, and healed myself through antibiotics that i'm currently finishing up tomorrow.

from this terrible sickness, i had to accept that i would be falling behind in schoolwork. i was able to make up the quizzes/assignments i missed with no problem (but there's no telling if i did well on them). i was surprised at the amount i had missed in one short week -- when i only have class 3 days a week. yes, i sacrificed 4 days a week of school for scheduling of 5 classes in 3 days. which also means i'm stuck at school for a glorious 14 hours on wednesdays and thursdays. in turn, i spend a ton of money during these days trying to feed myself (eating on campus is costly) and by the time i get home around 8pm, i'm exhausted and don't want to cook, so i spend more money on a little dinner. but i've accepted 2 days a week of spending into an unemployed grad student budget.

i began to accept that my apartment renovations will never be finished. there was a time, briefly, when renovations took place 5 days a week, monday to friday. the drilling, hammering, painting, dust, and overall noise from these renovations was driving me crazy and made it extremely difficult to concentrate (or for the better part of january, get some rest to get over a sickness). it's saturday today, and this morning i was rudely awoken by the loud sounds of hammering above or below me at 9am. it's now almost 4pm and the hammering and drilling have yet to stop. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?! do your fucking renovations on weekdays and  leave my weekends free of the noise! ugh. i wish i had the ability to block out noise and sleep through anything.

i've accepted the fact that too many of my plans involve (and are dependent on) drinking in some way. this became evident while being on those antibiotics and i wasn't able to go out and drink, so i just didn't go out at all. this isn't necessarily a bad thing; i just never realized it before.

i suppose the good news here is that i was accepted to seneca's post-grad green business management program for september 2012. but there's no telling what will happen in between now and when i have to accept the offer. i could get offered a sweet as job doing something cool. or, y'know, still be an unemployed bum.

we'll see how i go about accepting things in the near future.

apartment trouble

if someone asked me what the three integral components of a 'good' apartment would be, i'd tell them that it's:

1) location;
2) location and;
3) fuck, i don't even know what the third is because i can't focus with all this fucking drilling.

it started off back in september when they decided to renovate both the apartment below me and down the hall from me. they were hammering and drilling constantly. and the sound of people dropping things. the amount of times i heard something drop was ridiculous. the times of renovations seemed to vary -- usually between before 8am but never after 8pm. yes. 12 hours of drilling. this went on for days, weeks, and then months. it got to a point where i had tuned it out completely. or so i thought.

and then -- all of a sudden -- i didn't have to tune it out anymore. it had stopped. i slept well for close to a week. well, for the week that i didn't hear the crazy man outside screaming profanities at 4am. yesterday, the drilling started again. it woke me up before 9am on my day to sleep in. this time, it was from above me. now, i was certain there were people living up there for the last 2 months. i've heard them arguing and dropping shit. i 'veheard an animal -- cat or dog -- running around. i may have also heard them having sex; but that could have been the apartments next to me.

i understand that renovations are a great thing. hell, our apartment looks awesome. but the 12 hours of drilling gives me a headache. i try to drown it out with music. sometimes, i'm successful. other times, i'll leave my apartment to go to school and the drilling will just be in my head. it doesn't seem to matter where i am in the apartment too, but the majority of the drilling seems to take place above my room; the place where i'm supposed to get the most done.

over reading week, i locked myself in my apartment in order to study and write my assignments for two days. i'm surprised at the marks i received on those assignments since it was so difficult to concentrate while they renovated the places next to me and below me. i imagine that several of my sentences had coherent thoughts followed by a string of durrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

many of these renovation woes also shut off my water for hours without any warning. i believe it was 4 days in october and so far, twice in november. luckily, i was never home for the 2 days this month -- or perhaps i was and i just didn't need water. i mean, i'm by no means a shut in (despite what needed to be done over reading week) but like most people, i enjoy being home and hanging out. i get work done here. distractions are usually minimal. the internet works unlike the internet at school. yet... with the constant drilling, being focused is a serious problem. and there is so much work to be done in the coming weeks.

at least there are 2 days on the weekend when the drilling stops. i just need toronto to shut up on weekends so i can get some sleep.

cue the wubwubwubwubwub at the loudest possible volume. fuck you, renovators!