(dis)abled

for whatever reason since i moved to toronto, i've been dealing with a seemingly never-ending list of ailments. the latest being the stupidity of my knees/legs not working properly. and let me tell you, toronto is hardly accessible for the functional pedestrian, let alone those who aren't quite able-bodied.

my knees got exceptionally bad the past couple weeks and i've been back on meds the last couple days with positive improvements. like the majority of toronto pedestrians, i spend a lot of my time commuting on the ttc during rush hour. i, like everyone else, still have to get to work, whether my knees work or not. i can't afford constant taxis (not an uber because windows phone problems), i can't always walk a long distance (or short distances some days) and i definitely can't bike.

on one particularly rough knee day, it's rush hour and i'm trying to get home. a couple of king streetcars pass by me, too packed for me to even begin to think about getting on. a third one comes along and although i've been standing around the longest, everyone rushes the streetcar before it stops. it looks like there might be some room and i make a move. i make it onto the streetcar and move about an inch from the white line and can barely stand on my own two feet. i have a very noticeable limp. i look around frantically to see if someone might be able to give up their seat for me. in the blue accessible seats is an older lady and two younger looking people. as i continue looking around and trying to make eye contact with anyone at all sitting down, i feel a small tap on my back and a quiet voice: "sweetie, do you need a seat?".

it's the older lady. the only one who has noticed me get on the streetcar and require a seat. now, the last thing i want to do is move this older lady from her seat because i need one. i also do not feel comfortable asking someone for a seat because they might have some sort of invisible, underlying disability. or maybe they've been on their feet for 8+ hours a day and the only time they got to sit down was their commute home. i can only hope that someone who is a bit more able-bodied than me at the time will be nice enough to get up and let me have their seat.

i smiled at the old lady, nodded my head, and said "yeah, i do. is that okay?". the second i said something, the two younger people got up from the seats and moved so i could sit down. i was grateful, but the entire situation could have been avoided if everyone paid attention to the people getting on the streetcar.

a similar encounter happened while i was with another friend during rush hour on the subway. a train rolls into the station as the two of us are on the escalator down. as we're in no real rush and i can't quite move that fast, we get off the escalator and take a few steps toward the train when the doors ding dang dong. a few more steps and we would have been on the train with no issues. instead, an older man barrels down the escalator at full speed, yells, and pushes right through us to get on the train, nearly knocking the two of us down in the process. the doors close and the train leaves while we try to gather ourselves back up and realize that an older man just pushed two young girls out of the way to get on a train during rush hour. i was dumbfounded. 30 seconds later, another train rolled into the station and we were on our way again.

a slight push in the wrong direction, a twist of my own body, or my foot touching the crack of a sidewalk the wrong way can cause me a lot of distress and a possible dislocation/sublaxation of my knees. i wear knee braces to minimize the risk of this happening, but there is always possibility. this is why my greatest fear is now people. i can only be so careful to avoid certain situations and crowds, but i still have to get around, get to work, get home, go to buy groceries, attempt a social life and try my best to continue living life to the best of my ability.

i think the biggest problem is that when you see my face, i look like a young and healthy girl. a young, normal girl with knees that don't work the way they should.

please be mindful of those around you and don't fucking barrel through people. i assure you, the last thing you want to do is hear me scream if my knees dislocate. i guarantee you will be hearing that scream until you die. just ask my coworkers in that kitchen during the summer of 2011.

my recycling nightmare

since september, i've become one of the 1.6 million daily riders of the ttc. it's pretty convenient for getting around, especially when i can get from my place to school in about an hour.

but ttc advertising is a little strange sometimes. i'll admit that some of the posters gain my interest and i'll google the place/company/product/whatever and go on their advertised website if i remember once i'm near a computer (because SOME of us have a phone that calls and texts people, rather than to surf the interwebs). for instance, when i saw a poster for an MTax; mostly just for tyler and his tax business. or when i saw one for memorial university in newfoundland as a couple of programs were extremely relevant to my undergrad. or even, fuck, subway subs of the day. 

yes, ttc advertising works. but i don't enjoy this month's ttc advertisements. the idea is to make the ttc "litter free" and depicts various litter items, such as newspapers and coffee cups on the seats of the train or on the platform floors, saying "i don't belong here" or "put me where i belong" or something along those lines. at the bottom of the advertisement, the 3 standard ttc recycling stations are pictured and it says to "put litter in its place" or again -- something along those lines. my outrage over this matter makes my memory fuzzy when it comes to the actual wording on the advertisement.

this isn't the actual advertisement, but still pretty neat.

as i was preparing to run a sustainability workshop this week for university of toronto clubs executives, it became extremely clear to me that we're basically in a crisis when it comes to effective and appropriate recycling strategies. not that many people actually know HOW to recycle without compromising a bin. the city of toronto website offers a great deal of information on the subject AND even has a waste wizard that allows you to figure out what items go where if they aren't listed.

my concerns aren't really over the fact that people don't know how to recycle a newspaper. those handy metros and onions and whatever else is there to keep you sane during a commute belong in one bin; the one labelled with the pictures and words of newspapers. and even still, i see many commuters putting them in the garbage. whyyyyyyyyyy?! why does this happen?! it takes the same amount of time to recycle wrong as it does to recycle right! 

all recycling varies by regions and municipalities, sometimes even city to city, or town to town. it's important to be informed about what your area recycles and what it doesn't. being a recycling station monitor at greenbuild in october 2011 definitely helped me understand toronto's insane recycling policies. which is also why the ttc advertising frustrates me. how many of you actually know how to recycle your takeout coffee cups? tim hortons roll up the rim cups, mcdonalds, and starbucks coffee cups plague the city and the subway. the majority of my friends don't have a clue how to recycle their coffee cups. so if they don't know how, there's a good chance that everyone who isn't me doesn't know either. 

here's the breakdown (taken word for word from my sustainability workshop powerpoint):

Standard 3 category (Paper, Plastics, Garbage) recycling station:

Sleeves and cups go in PAPER
Lids, stirrers, teabags, etc go in the GARBAGE

When an “Organics" bin is included:
Sleeves and cups go in PAPER
Stirrers, teabags, etc go in ORGANICS
Lids go in the GARBAGE

When a “Coffee Cup/Coffee Miscellaneous" bin is included:
Sleeves go in PAPER
Lids go in GARBAGE
Coffee cups, teabags, stirrers, etc can all usually go in the COFFEE CUP/COFFEE MISCELLANEOUS

see, it's more difficult than you expected! that's exactly why i can't stand the takeout coffee cup "i don't belong here" ttc poster advertisement. the city should make their advertising more effective by showing commuters where each item of the coffee cup goes in the recycling bin process. then there would be even less compromise in ttc bins.... i hope! 

perhaps i'll even write a letter (email?) to the ttc and express my rage in their advertising campaign. i just hope i'm not the only one making a big deal about this.

first day of grad school

today was my first day of grad school.

i had one class and it started at 8am. which meant that i needed to be up at 6am and out of my apartment before 7am in order to arrive to class on time. and that's not including the ridiculous strike traffic. i rolled out of bed and dreaded the day ahead.

i left around 6:40am and did the zombie walk to the subway. grabbed the subway easily and rode to finch where i just barely made the express bus to school. i made it to school by 7:30am. now i know that i can leave a little later tomorrow when i have to do it all again, and once again on friday. yes, i have 3 8am classes a week. this is not the grad school classes i imagined. hopefully next semester will be better.

it felt strange to be back in the classroom. i looked around and knew nobody. there was a definite age gap in my classmates. where were my TREN girls at? no where. it was depressing. the professor was late so the coordinator took over until he got there. this is when the coordinator told me to switch my one class to the other 8am on friday. i was not happy. class flew by and we didn't do much, similar to most of the first day introductions i've been in before.

i made friends with the two girls next to me who seemed to be remotely my age and i walked with the one over to admissions after class. she had the same problem as me: seneca needed 'proof of degree' from her. admissions opened at 10am and my class got out at 9:50am. the admissions lineup was all the way down the hall and almost around the corner when i got there. seeing as i had really nothing else to do today, i waited. and i waited. and i fucking waited. i waited an hour and 20 minutes to talk to someone. she told me that i needed to send a new transcript and a photocopy of my degree/confirmation of graduation and changed the expiry to the end of september. she told me not to panic. clearly, i was not in panic mode. perhaps i look panicky when i'm awake at 6am.

i headed home shortly after while talking to some of the strike people about their issues and whatnot while waiting for the bus. i like to be informed. the bus at finch going to school when i arrived at finch station had so many people waiting. i was glad to be going the opposite direction. i made it home around 12:30pm with a quick stop in at subway for lunch.

over the weekend, i saw lutzenkirchen, got drunk, and went to the eaton centre. i talked to someone at the eaton centre sport chek about possibly getting a transfer (even though i only worked 2 shifts at the niagara falls one) and she told me to call her on wednesday to figure it all out. in the meantime, i applied to various retail jobs at the mall and am waiting to hear back... if i hear back at all.

i need a good night's sleep.

toronto living

i officially live in toronto!

i moved in yesterday. i'm all settled and unpacked. my parents helped me move for most of the day after waiting for an hour for corey to open the door to the apartment. we only had one set of keys -- they were with corey. the movers were not impressed. here is the part where i would post pictures of my place, but alas, i am without a camera. one of the many things that i didn't pack.

i spent last night unwinding and catching up with tyler while waiting for corey to eventually come home, as i was now the sole protector of the coveted keys. i did go get them copied. no more waiting up for late corey anymore!

toronto is a loud city. i found it hard to sleep at night. so many sirens and people talking loudly on the street or apartments below. i hope that i'll be able to get over my light sleeping mode soon. i was up bright and early to get ready for my big day today. i commuted to seneca for the first time and met up with steve. he showed me around, i found the majority of my classes, got my osap and my student card. we grabbed a quick lunch at pizza hut and i commuted back home which took less time for some reason. also, on the subway, i definitely saw a dude that used to be in brock residence back in the day. i never met his eyes but i'm absolutely positive it was him. though i had never had a conversation with him in my residence days, i used to see him around constantly (and let's face it, i was pretty much crushin') -- and now i saw him in toronto. small world.

my parents called to inform me that a letter had arrived from seneca saying that i needed to show proof of my degree, proficiency in english at the college level, and a transcript in order to keep my conditional offer of acceptance. and an expiry of september 8. well, fuck. i don't know what i need to do and nobody seemed to give me a hard time today when i was getting all my shit done on campus. and since it's the long weekend, i won't hear from anyone until possibly tuesday. i'll have to wait in ridiculous lines to talk to somebody on tuesday and get it all sorted out.

it's friday night in toronto and i'm exhausted.