i had my interview with steamwhistle on monday for retail and event staff.
there were about 50 people, more or less, in the group interview. i was terrified on the inside but not so much on the outside. when everyone introduced themselves, i felt extremely discouraged. so many of these people were definitely more experienced in life, work, school, travel, whatever, than me. there were a few others that i knew i was better than them. but i still didn't feel as though i had much of a chance.
it started off with introductions; went onto a game of improv/charades (of which i didn't get a time to participate.. grr); then a brewery tour (with a beer in hand, of course); followed by breaking off into groups to create a steamwhistle commercial (something i've definitely done before); and ended with a brief Q&A. it was at the end of it all when they said that they were hiring for at most 12 positions, and there was a second group interview happening right after mine was finished. son of a bitch.
pretty much knowing i didn't have a chance, i had another 2 beers during the rest of the interview. i didn't care at this point. i didn't have any hopes -- and i was totally okay with that. it's not exactly what i'm looking for, even for a shitty summer job. and to no avail, i received the rejection email early this afternoon. sometimes, like a really fucking horrible first date, you just know things aren't going to work out in your favour. so fuck it all, i'm just gonna drink some beer. i'm sort of glad i found out today and not like, the end of the week, or never -- like the majority of niagara employers.
the better news was that i got an email/callback from mama earth organics to set up an interview. so i hope that goes over smoothly. this place is definitely more my style of things. it would be swell if i could find something soon-ish. my bank account moneys are gettin' pretty low.
the job hunt continues.
Mar 30, 2012
life stories for minimum wage
i have applied for 32 jobs in the past month. i have one interview on monday for steamwhistle.
about four years ago, i was dating this dude who, at the time, was much older than me -- like, 6 or 7 years older. when you're 20 dating a 26/27 year old, you tend to get some strange ideas about life. or maybe it was just the dude himself. he had a job working for a call centre. the pay was steady. he had his own car. he could afford things. but he still lived at home and he didn't quite see a need for 'advancement' or 'promotion' in his work or personal life just yet. there were many reasons as to why we never lasted, but i'm not about to get into those now.
during that summer, we had a tendency to go to many parties. i also felt weird bringing my much older boyfriend to parties and pub outings with my friends as we were all early 20s and many of my friends could never see eye to eye with the dude on any level. i also had this problem on several occasions. but yes, not to get into that. i figured he would have the same problem when he brought me to parties with his friends. and yet, this would never be the case.
at one party in particular, we showed up sort of late and the majority of everyone was already wasted. there was a bonfire in the backyard. nobody looked like they were drinking heavily. inside, people were talking music and i remember being a part of the conversation. the inside folk didn't seem too much more 'mature' or 'adult' than me at 20 years old and it made me feel better about myself. when i adventured outside, i conversed with 4 or 5 girls about nothing specific until one of them asked me a question i had only heard in tv shows/movies: "so, amber, what do you do?"
i wish there would have been some kind of visual interpretation of my mind going a mile a minute (or rather, this as being more appropriate) as i tried to figure out how to respond to the question. here i was, talking to a bunch of people older than me with these grown up jobs and careers in industries that i definitely did not want to be a part of later in life. i felt as if i told them i was finishing up school to get my bachelor's degree in tourism and environment, i would be totally out of place and shunned for my attempts at higher education. i already knew that most of these people at the party had never went on to post-secondary education.
i'm positive that by the time i answered this question, like 3 solid minutes of silence (i.e., thinking, collectively attributed to my state of drunk at the time) had gone by before i told them that i worked in a library. i could sense sighs of relief from these girls as a couple of them asked me follow up questions of what i do/which library and so on, which i of course had no problem answering.
ever since that fateful night, i've never been asked that dreaded question again. yes, i now hold in my hands a bachelor's degree and in 3 weeks, i'll have a post-graduate certificate. next september, i'll likely be heading back to school for another post-graduate certificate -- because i just can't land a job. many of the parties i've been to in the last year were filled with people just like me: students, undergraduate or graduate, or recent graduates trying to find a job/career.
the job market still sucks. i've applied to everything and everyone for practically anything where i meet some or all of the requirements. and i can't even get a callback for an interview, minus the one for steamwhistle next week.
so maybe the "what do you do?" question is on it's way out -- an obsolete question to ask people in a post-recession era whether you've had a job or career in the past. perhaps a better question to ask would be "how's the job search going?" or "how's the job market treating you?" or "are you in school?"
at lease these questions are a bit more open ended and specific so this way, when you try to tell people that you're a recent graduate who's unemployed and can't find a job in this job market/recession, they won't look at you like you're a crazy son of a bitch.
but hey -- does that not describe like 95% of all recent graduates right now?
about four years ago, i was dating this dude who, at the time, was much older than me -- like, 6 or 7 years older. when you're 20 dating a 26/27 year old, you tend to get some strange ideas about life. or maybe it was just the dude himself. he had a job working for a call centre. the pay was steady. he had his own car. he could afford things. but he still lived at home and he didn't quite see a need for 'advancement' or 'promotion' in his work or personal life just yet. there were many reasons as to why we never lasted, but i'm not about to get into those now.
during that summer, we had a tendency to go to many parties. i also felt weird bringing my much older boyfriend to parties and pub outings with my friends as we were all early 20s and many of my friends could never see eye to eye with the dude on any level. i also had this problem on several occasions. but yes, not to get into that. i figured he would have the same problem when he brought me to parties with his friends. and yet, this would never be the case.
at one party in particular, we showed up sort of late and the majority of everyone was already wasted. there was a bonfire in the backyard. nobody looked like they were drinking heavily. inside, people were talking music and i remember being a part of the conversation. the inside folk didn't seem too much more 'mature' or 'adult' than me at 20 years old and it made me feel better about myself. when i adventured outside, i conversed with 4 or 5 girls about nothing specific until one of them asked me a question i had only heard in tv shows/movies: "so, amber, what do you do?"
i wish there would have been some kind of visual interpretation of my mind going a mile a minute (or rather, this as being more appropriate) as i tried to figure out how to respond to the question. here i was, talking to a bunch of people older than me with these grown up jobs and careers in industries that i definitely did not want to be a part of later in life. i felt as if i told them i was finishing up school to get my bachelor's degree in tourism and environment, i would be totally out of place and shunned for my attempts at higher education. i already knew that most of these people at the party had never went on to post-secondary education.
i'm positive that by the time i answered this question, like 3 solid minutes of silence (i.e., thinking, collectively attributed to my state of drunk at the time) had gone by before i told them that i worked in a library. i could sense sighs of relief from these girls as a couple of them asked me follow up questions of what i do/which library and so on, which i of course had no problem answering.
ever since that fateful night, i've never been asked that dreaded question again. yes, i now hold in my hands a bachelor's degree and in 3 weeks, i'll have a post-graduate certificate. next september, i'll likely be heading back to school for another post-graduate certificate -- because i just can't land a job. many of the parties i've been to in the last year were filled with people just like me: students, undergraduate or graduate, or recent graduates trying to find a job/career.
the job market still sucks. i've applied to everything and everyone for practically anything where i meet some or all of the requirements. and i can't even get a callback for an interview, minus the one for steamwhistle next week.
so maybe the "what do you do?" question is on it's way out -- an obsolete question to ask people in a post-recession era whether you've had a job or career in the past. perhaps a better question to ask would be "how's the job search going?" or "how's the job market treating you?" or "are you in school?"
at lease these questions are a bit more open ended and specific so this way, when you try to tell people that you're a recent graduate who's unemployed and can't find a job in this job market/recession, they won't look at you like you're a crazy son of a bitch.
but hey -- does that not describe like 95% of all recent graduates right now?
Mar 12, 2012
my recycling nightmare
since september, i've become one of the 1.6 million daily riders of the ttc. it's pretty convenient for getting around, especially when i can get from my place to school in about an hour.
but ttc advertising is a little strange sometimes. i'll admit that some of the posters gain my interest and i'll google the place/company/product/whatever and go on their advertised website if i remember once i'm near a computer (because SOME of us have a phone that calls and texts people, rather than to surf the interwebs). for instance, when i saw a poster for an MTax; mostly just for tyler and his tax business. or when i saw one for memorial university in newfoundland as a couple of programs were extremely relevant to my undergrad. or even, fuck, subway subs of the day.
yes, ttc advertising works. but i don't enjoy this month's ttc advertisements. the idea is to make the ttc "litter free" and depicts various litter items, such as newspapers and coffee cups on the seats of the train or on the platform floors, saying "i don't belong here" or "put me where i belong" or something along those lines. at the bottom of the advertisement, the 3 standard ttc recycling stations are pictured and it says to "put litter in its place" or again -- something along those lines. my outrage over this matter makes my memory fuzzy when it comes to the actual wording on the advertisement.
here's the breakdown (taken word for word from my sustainability workshop powerpoint):
Standard 3 category (Paper, Plastics, Garbage) recycling station:
but ttc advertising is a little strange sometimes. i'll admit that some of the posters gain my interest and i'll google the place/company/product/whatever and go on their advertised website if i remember once i'm near a computer (because SOME of us have a phone that calls and texts people, rather than to surf the interwebs). for instance, when i saw a poster for an MTax; mostly just for tyler and his tax business. or when i saw one for memorial university in newfoundland as a couple of programs were extremely relevant to my undergrad. or even, fuck, subway subs of the day.
yes, ttc advertising works. but i don't enjoy this month's ttc advertisements. the idea is to make the ttc "litter free" and depicts various litter items, such as newspapers and coffee cups on the seats of the train or on the platform floors, saying "i don't belong here" or "put me where i belong" or something along those lines. at the bottom of the advertisement, the 3 standard ttc recycling stations are pictured and it says to "put litter in its place" or again -- something along those lines. my outrage over this matter makes my memory fuzzy when it comes to the actual wording on the advertisement.
 | |||
| this isn't the actual advertisement, but still pretty neat. |
as i was preparing to run a sustainability workshop this week for university of toronto clubs executives, it became extremely clear to me that we're basically in a crisis when it comes to effective and appropriate recycling strategies. not that many people actually know HOW to recycle without compromising a bin. the city of toronto website offers a great deal of information on the subject AND even has a waste wizard that allows you to figure out what items go where if they aren't listed.
my concerns aren't really over the fact that people don't know how to recycle a newspaper. those handy metros and onions and whatever else is there to keep you sane during a commute belong in one bin; the one labelled with the pictures and words of newspapers. and even still, i see many commuters putting them in the garbage. whyyyyyyyyyy?! why does this happen?! it takes the same amount of time to recycle wrong as it does to recycle right!
all recycling varies by regions and municipalities, sometimes even city to city, or town to town. it's important to be informed about what your area recycles and what it doesn't. being a recycling station monitor at greenbuild in october 2011 definitely helped me understand toronto's insane recycling policies. which is also why the ttc advertising frustrates me. how many of you actually know how to recycle your takeout coffee cups? tim hortons roll up the rim cups, mcdonalds, and starbucks coffee cups plague the city and the subway. the majority of my friends don't have a clue how to recycle their coffee cups. so if they don't know how, there's a good chance that everyone who isn't me doesn't know either.
Standard 3 category (Paper, Plastics, Garbage) recycling station:
Sleeves and cups go in PAPER
Lids, stirrers, teabags, etc go in the GARBAGE
When an “Organics" bin is included:
Sleeves and cups go in PAPER
Stirrers, teabags, etc go in ORGANICS
Lids go in the GARBAGE
When a “Coffee Cup/Coffee Miscellaneous" bin is included:
Sleeves go in PAPER
Lids go in GARBAGE
Coffee cups, teabags, stirrers, etc can all usually go in the COFFEE CUP/COFFEE MISCELLANEOUS
Lids, stirrers, teabags, etc go in the GARBAGE
When an “Organics" bin is included:
Sleeves and cups go in PAPER
Stirrers, teabags, etc go in ORGANICS
Lids go in the GARBAGE
When a “Coffee Cup/Coffee Miscellaneous" bin is included:
Sleeves go in PAPER
Lids go in GARBAGE
Coffee cups, teabags, stirrers, etc can all usually go in the COFFEE CUP/COFFEE MISCELLANEOUS
see, it's more difficult than you expected! that's exactly why i can't stand the takeout coffee cup "i don't belong here" ttc poster advertisement. the city should make their advertising more effective by showing commuters where each item of the coffee cup goes in the recycling bin process. then there would be even less compromise in ttc bins.... i hope!
perhaps i'll even write a letter (email?) to the ttc and express my rage in their advertising campaign. i just hope i'm not the only one making a big deal about this.
Mar 2, 2012
the job hunt begins
the last possible day of exams is april 20th. which means there are just under 50 days left of my first post-graduate career.
how did that happen?
so, in 50 days, i'll have an undergraduate degree and a post-graduate degree. and that should make me qualified to do something cool, right? like.. a job with something in my field. like.. a job where i can use what i've learned in the last 6 years and apply it to some kind of a real world situation. am i wrong?
i'll be honest. last year's disappointment in the summer job/career search left me feeling pretty down. i'm still not entirely sure what it was that i was doing wrong -- or if it wasn't me, but rather, them.
a recession.
a terrible employer.
a "we have jobs but we don't have jobs".
a decline in tourism.
a decline in sales.
a decline in jobs.
an overhiring.
the list goes on.
i was not happy with anything that happened last summer and my income definitely reflects that. but there wasn't a whole lot i could do to combat how terrible things were in the job market.
yet, it doesn't seem any different being in toronto. jobs i applied to back in september/december had no calls. jobs i've applied to in january/february still have no calls. jobs i'm applying to now -- for things i know i can do -- have no calls. i have many more connections and networking possibilities in the city but only a couple that can work out to my advantage. but i don't necessarily want to be that kid who gets the sweet job 'cause they know somebody; the ethics and the morals would get the best of me.
i know i'm not the only one suffering trying to find a job. several of my friends who are recent graduates or quit work looking for something better are still having the same issues at attempting to find a job, summer or otherwise.
i'm walking into this job hunt with a little bit of optimism; whatever actually remains from last summer's ridiculous 7 jobs i mostly had for a 2 week span. only because i feel like i have more of an opportunity to land something, whether it's in my field or not, in the city rather than back in niagara.
statistics of 400 applicants for an entry level, minimum wage secretarial position in niagara still scares the fuck out of me.
how did that happen?
so, in 50 days, i'll have an undergraduate degree and a post-graduate degree. and that should make me qualified to do something cool, right? like.. a job with something in my field. like.. a job where i can use what i've learned in the last 6 years and apply it to some kind of a real world situation. am i wrong?
i'll be honest. last year's disappointment in the summer job/career search left me feeling pretty down. i'm still not entirely sure what it was that i was doing wrong -- or if it wasn't me, but rather, them.
a recession.
a terrible employer.
a "we have jobs but we don't have jobs".
a decline in tourism.
a decline in sales.
a decline in jobs.
an overhiring.
the list goes on.
i was not happy with anything that happened last summer and my income definitely reflects that. but there wasn't a whole lot i could do to combat how terrible things were in the job market.
yet, it doesn't seem any different being in toronto. jobs i applied to back in september/december had no calls. jobs i've applied to in january/february still have no calls. jobs i'm applying to now -- for things i know i can do -- have no calls. i have many more connections and networking possibilities in the city but only a couple that can work out to my advantage. but i don't necessarily want to be that kid who gets the sweet job 'cause they know somebody; the ethics and the morals would get the best of me.
i know i'm not the only one suffering trying to find a job. several of my friends who are recent graduates or quit work looking for something better are still having the same issues at attempting to find a job, summer or otherwise.
i'm walking into this job hunt with a little bit of optimism; whatever actually remains from last summer's ridiculous 7 jobs i mostly had for a 2 week span. only because i feel like i have more of an opportunity to land something, whether it's in my field or not, in the city rather than back in niagara.
statistics of 400 applicants for an entry level, minimum wage secretarial position in niagara still scares the fuck out of me.
Feb 12, 2012
positive
one of the main things i like best about meeting new people is to experience a different outlook on life, whether it's negative or positive.
i try to do my best in surrounding myself with positive people but that doesn't always happen or necessarily work out to my advantage. most people deal with shitty things in shitty ways and i can empathize with that.
it's a pretty rare occurrence for me to meet someone who's about equal to me in positivity and optimism even if sometimes that positivity is hidden under some pretty mean sarcastic comments. and yet, i've met a couple dudes that i can compare myself to. one of these dudes in particular, i'm absolutely positive (ha!) that i've never heard him say anything remotely negative... about any fucking subject. this sort of baffles me and intrigues me at the same time. because, in a way, i used to do the same. and i kind of still do, on occasion.
not only does this dude have this shining positive brilliance, but he makes me appreciate myself and the things i've done even more (although i'm not exactly sure if it's possible). because, hell, i've done some pretty amazing things and i can do some pretty amazing things. it's almost inspiring to be reminded how awesome you are with one simple positive comment that gets you thinking about your life experiences.
it's easy to rack up a number of negative reasons for a negative event/occurrence but the positive sides of things aren't normally a long list.
i think what people fail to realize is that a positive aura is fucking sexy as hell. especially to a girl like me.
there's definitely a fine line between "positive" (that's so fucking cool) and "neutral" (i don't really care) and i would gladly take the positive over anything in the world. and besides, you'll get a cooler story out of a negative event spun into a positive meaning, even if it makes everyone around you laugh at the story. the idea is to accept bad things when they happen and find something positive about them in order to move on from it. and most people, generally speaking, lack this ability.
but hey, if i can do it, and this dude can do it, i wholeheartedly believe that anyone can under the right circumstances.
happiness is not a fleeting concept.
it's right there, waiting for you.
"the call is from heroism... will you accept the charges?"
i try to do my best in surrounding myself with positive people but that doesn't always happen or necessarily work out to my advantage. most people deal with shitty things in shitty ways and i can empathize with that.
it's a pretty rare occurrence for me to meet someone who's about equal to me in positivity and optimism even if sometimes that positivity is hidden under some pretty mean sarcastic comments. and yet, i've met a couple dudes that i can compare myself to. one of these dudes in particular, i'm absolutely positive (ha!) that i've never heard him say anything remotely negative... about any fucking subject. this sort of baffles me and intrigues me at the same time. because, in a way, i used to do the same. and i kind of still do, on occasion.
not only does this dude have this shining positive brilliance, but he makes me appreciate myself and the things i've done even more (although i'm not exactly sure if it's possible). because, hell, i've done some pretty amazing things and i can do some pretty amazing things. it's almost inspiring to be reminded how awesome you are with one simple positive comment that gets you thinking about your life experiences.
it's easy to rack up a number of negative reasons for a negative event/occurrence but the positive sides of things aren't normally a long list.
i think what people fail to realize is that a positive aura is fucking sexy as hell. especially to a girl like me.
there's definitely a fine line between "positive" (that's so fucking cool) and "neutral" (i don't really care) and i would gladly take the positive over anything in the world. and besides, you'll get a cooler story out of a negative event spun into a positive meaning, even if it makes everyone around you laugh at the story. the idea is to accept bad things when they happen and find something positive about them in order to move on from it. and most people, generally speaking, lack this ability.
but hey, if i can do it, and this dude can do it, i wholeheartedly believe that anyone can under the right circumstances.
happiness is not a fleeting concept.
it's right there, waiting for you.
"the call is from heroism... will you accept the charges?"
Feb 8, 2012
horrific images
i'm an extremely visual person.
i tend to remember things better when i see them and write them several times. want me to regurgitate a diagram? sure, no problem. remember the exact detail of that dude's body i hooked up with 4 years ago? yeah, feels like it happened yesterday.
but it has some drawbacks.
there have been certain times in my life where i've wanted to forget an image or a situation. but my mind won't let me do that. many of these images/situations that i want to lose are ones that play over in my head again and again, despite how awful or embarrassing they were.
i've seen a lot of really shitty things since i moved to toronto. it mostly deals with the crazy people that roam the streets and sometimes i might get lucky and see something that is positive and brightens my day. for instance, yesterday i saw a hit and run. a car literally took the side off of a taxi and almost ran me over in the get away. there was some honking and the car turned the corner and stopped at the side of the road while the taxi waited patiently for the pedestrians to cross at the intersection. as soon as we crossed the street and the taxi moved forward, the car drove off. that's pretty fucking shitty. my dad and i were involved in a similar situation last summer, so i can relate. kind of adds to my reasons of not wanting to drive.
an earlier situation during a snowstorm at a different intersection almost cost me my life as well, had i not have used some discretion of crossing the street. a car going pretty slow heading up to the lights at an intersection must have hit a slippery patch of snow and the brakes didn't work; leaving the car to slide practically halfway through the intersection. if i would have stepped out from the sidewalk, he would have ran right over me.
this morning, i saw something i would prefer to forget. but since i know i won't, i'll write about it instead. i don't know what about this entire situation made me so upset.
i saw an older man on crutches missing his left leg. the whole leg, way up last the thigh. he hobbled along on his crutches across the intersection and for some reason, decided to hobble along through the garden of the community centre. i watched as his movements through the garden baffled me. i couldn't understand why he chose the path that was the most difficult. i figured he was on his way when the bus arrived. as i got on the bus, i could hear through the music from my headphones, a man arguing with the bus driver. it was the man with one leg. i didn't quite hear what the argument was about, but the bus driver let him on and he made his way down the aisle.
a block later, he screamed at the bus driver to stop the bus and let him off, where he proceeded to attempt to cross the street with a heavy flow of traffic and the 'don't walk' sign flashing. immediately, i saw and heard the sounds of cars screeching their brakes and honking at the man. i thought for sure i was going to see this man get slammed by a car trying to cross the street at 7am. when he reached the other side, he began to cross the other section of the street again, disobeying pedestrian signals. there was more honking and screeching brakes. the man stopped in front of a car attempting to turn through the intersection as he could not cross any further with the flow of traffic. eventually, he was able to make it to the other side and the bus drove through the lights and kept on the route.
i don't know what was going through this man's head while he did the things he did this morning but i have a feeling he was unhappy with his life. i would be too, in his situation. but just the thought that this man may not want to live anymore (and get hit by a car) upset me greatly. to lose all will to live in any situation, whether shitty or ideal, is something that hits me in an unusual way. even when life gets me down to a degree when everything is awful, i try to find the positive and move on from it, because i know eventually things will get better. it might not be right away and it might take quite some time, but i know whatever i'm facing will pass.
i only wish that people would think the way i do about these circumstances of life and death and then something as trivial as this man with one leg wouldn't be drilled into my mind forever.
i tend to remember things better when i see them and write them several times. want me to regurgitate a diagram? sure, no problem. remember the exact detail of that dude's body i hooked up with 4 years ago? yeah, feels like it happened yesterday.
but it has some drawbacks.
there have been certain times in my life where i've wanted to forget an image or a situation. but my mind won't let me do that. many of these images/situations that i want to lose are ones that play over in my head again and again, despite how awful or embarrassing they were.
i've seen a lot of really shitty things since i moved to toronto. it mostly deals with the crazy people that roam the streets and sometimes i might get lucky and see something that is positive and brightens my day. for instance, yesterday i saw a hit and run. a car literally took the side off of a taxi and almost ran me over in the get away. there was some honking and the car turned the corner and stopped at the side of the road while the taxi waited patiently for the pedestrians to cross at the intersection. as soon as we crossed the street and the taxi moved forward, the car drove off. that's pretty fucking shitty. my dad and i were involved in a similar situation last summer, so i can relate. kind of adds to my reasons of not wanting to drive.
an earlier situation during a snowstorm at a different intersection almost cost me my life as well, had i not have used some discretion of crossing the street. a car going pretty slow heading up to the lights at an intersection must have hit a slippery patch of snow and the brakes didn't work; leaving the car to slide practically halfway through the intersection. if i would have stepped out from the sidewalk, he would have ran right over me.
this morning, i saw something i would prefer to forget. but since i know i won't, i'll write about it instead. i don't know what about this entire situation made me so upset.
i saw an older man on crutches missing his left leg. the whole leg, way up last the thigh. he hobbled along on his crutches across the intersection and for some reason, decided to hobble along through the garden of the community centre. i watched as his movements through the garden baffled me. i couldn't understand why he chose the path that was the most difficult. i figured he was on his way when the bus arrived. as i got on the bus, i could hear through the music from my headphones, a man arguing with the bus driver. it was the man with one leg. i didn't quite hear what the argument was about, but the bus driver let him on and he made his way down the aisle.
a block later, he screamed at the bus driver to stop the bus and let him off, where he proceeded to attempt to cross the street with a heavy flow of traffic and the 'don't walk' sign flashing. immediately, i saw and heard the sounds of cars screeching their brakes and honking at the man. i thought for sure i was going to see this man get slammed by a car trying to cross the street at 7am. when he reached the other side, he began to cross the other section of the street again, disobeying pedestrian signals. there was more honking and screeching brakes. the man stopped in front of a car attempting to turn through the intersection as he could not cross any further with the flow of traffic. eventually, he was able to make it to the other side and the bus drove through the lights and kept on the route.
i don't know what was going through this man's head while he did the things he did this morning but i have a feeling he was unhappy with his life. i would be too, in his situation. but just the thought that this man may not want to live anymore (and get hit by a car) upset me greatly. to lose all will to live in any situation, whether shitty or ideal, is something that hits me in an unusual way. even when life gets me down to a degree when everything is awful, i try to find the positive and move on from it, because i know eventually things will get better. it might not be right away and it might take quite some time, but i know whatever i'm facing will pass.
i only wish that people would think the way i do about these circumstances of life and death and then something as trivial as this man with one leg wouldn't be drilled into my mind forever.
Feb 4, 2012
acceptance
i like to think of acceptance as both good and really terrible. why? i'm glad you asked.
i've been doing a lot of 'accepting' in 2012 so far. for instance, i accepted that i had a cold and i beat it down until i felt better with natural remedies. then, i was fine for almost a week until my body decided to play a cruel joke on me and make me feel six thousand times worse than i actually did before. and when i didn't accept the fact that i haven't felt that bad since i was about 7 years old, it got worse. much worse. i had to accept that i needed help, went to the walk-in clinic, and healed myself through antibiotics that i'm currently finishing up tomorrow.
from this terrible sickness, i had to accept that i would be falling behind in schoolwork. i was able to make up the quizzes/assignments i missed with no problem (but there's no telling if i did well on them). i was surprised at the amount i had missed in one short week -- when i only have class 3 days a week. yes, i sacrificed 4 days a week of school for scheduling of 5 classes in 3 days. which also means i'm stuck at school for a glorious 14 hours on wednesdays and thursdays. in turn, i spend a ton of money during these days trying to feed myself (eating on campus is costly) and by the time i get home around 8pm, i'm exhausted and don't want to cook, so i spend more money on a little dinner. but i've accepted 2 days a week of spending into an unemployed grad student budget.
i began to accept that my apartment renovations will never be finished. there was a time, briefly, when renovations took place 5 days a week, monday to friday. the drilling, hammering, painting, dust, and overall noise from these renovations was driving me crazy and made it extremely difficult to concentrate (or for the better part of january, get some rest to get over a sickness). it's saturday today, and this morning i was rudely awoken by the loud sounds of hammering above or below me at 9am. it's now almost 4pm and the hammering and drilling have yet to stop. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?! do your fucking renovations on weekdays and leave my weekends free of the noise! ugh. i wish i had the ability to block out noise and sleep through anything.
i've accepted the fact that too many of my plans involve (and are dependent on) drinking in some way. this became evident while being on those antibiotics and i wasn't able to go out and drink, so i just didn't go out at all. this isn't necessarily a bad thing; i just never realized it before.
i suppose the good news here is that i was accepted to seneca's post-grad green business management program for september 2012. but there's no telling what will happen in between now and when i have to accept the offer. i could get offered a sweet as job doing something cool. or, y'know, still be an unemployed bum.
we'll see how i go about accepting things in the near future.
i've been doing a lot of 'accepting' in 2012 so far. for instance, i accepted that i had a cold and i beat it down until i felt better with natural remedies. then, i was fine for almost a week until my body decided to play a cruel joke on me and make me feel six thousand times worse than i actually did before. and when i didn't accept the fact that i haven't felt that bad since i was about 7 years old, it got worse. much worse. i had to accept that i needed help, went to the walk-in clinic, and healed myself through antibiotics that i'm currently finishing up tomorrow.
from this terrible sickness, i had to accept that i would be falling behind in schoolwork. i was able to make up the quizzes/assignments i missed with no problem (but there's no telling if i did well on them). i was surprised at the amount i had missed in one short week -- when i only have class 3 days a week. yes, i sacrificed 4 days a week of school for scheduling of 5 classes in 3 days. which also means i'm stuck at school for a glorious 14 hours on wednesdays and thursdays. in turn, i spend a ton of money during these days trying to feed myself (eating on campus is costly) and by the time i get home around 8pm, i'm exhausted and don't want to cook, so i spend more money on a little dinner. but i've accepted 2 days a week of spending into an unemployed grad student budget.
i began to accept that my apartment renovations will never be finished. there was a time, briefly, when renovations took place 5 days a week, monday to friday. the drilling, hammering, painting, dust, and overall noise from these renovations was driving me crazy and made it extremely difficult to concentrate (or for the better part of january, get some rest to get over a sickness). it's saturday today, and this morning i was rudely awoken by the loud sounds of hammering above or below me at 9am. it's now almost 4pm and the hammering and drilling have yet to stop. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?! do your fucking renovations on weekdays and leave my weekends free of the noise! ugh. i wish i had the ability to block out noise and sleep through anything.
i've accepted the fact that too many of my plans involve (and are dependent on) drinking in some way. this became evident while being on those antibiotics and i wasn't able to go out and drink, so i just didn't go out at all. this isn't necessarily a bad thing; i just never realized it before.
i suppose the good news here is that i was accepted to seneca's post-grad green business management program for september 2012. but there's no telling what will happen in between now and when i have to accept the offer. i could get offered a sweet as job doing something cool. or, y'know, still be an unemployed bum.
we'll see how i go about accepting things in the near future.
Jan 5, 2012
money money money
free money is a glorious thing.
with all the talk about the recent tuition grants put forth by the government and terrible advertising such as this particular video, i was upset and frustrated to find out that i'm ineligible for the grant. but, who's eligible for the grant?
well, if you are dependent on your parents, your parents make less than $160,000, you are in good academic standing, and you're from ontario. who's ineligible? everyone listed here and over 500,000 post-secondary students across ontario. grad students, part-time students, international students, law, medicine, dentistry, pharmacy, optometry, and education students are all shit out of of luck on this tuition grant.
yeah. i graduated high school in 2006. it's now 2012. i would hope that i wouldn't be dependent on my parents by now. but, here's where OSAP fucked me over -- i didn't work in high school, in fact, i didn't have my first job until 2007. i had applied for OSAP in my first year of my undergrad and my parents 'made too much money'. and even though i was living on residence and had zero moneys for anything, they gave me just under $2,000 that year. my parents at the time were supporting 2 children for post-secondary education and were definitely not making 'too much' money to support their children and live a comfortable life.
i didn't bother applying for 2007/2008. i had made almost enough working during the summer (back when minimum wage was $8.25) to afford the costs of my tuition but no where close to my residence fees. i worked during this year and saved up some money. in the summer of 2008, i couldn't land a well-paying job and only occasionally worked weekends at a camp on call for 2 months. so i had applied to OSAP for 2008/2009. this time, they gave me just over $2,000. again, not nearly enough to cover tuition or residence fees. i didn't have that much money in the bank, but i was now working just under 20 hours a week during the school year. my parents didn't make that much money, in fact, they made even less that year, and they still had to support 2 children in post-secondary education.
i had a part-time job during the summer of 2009 and a full-time job for just over a month. my bank account was starting to grow. in 2009/2010, OSAP decided to be sort of nice to me since i had stayed in school and used them twice before. i was living at home for first semester and working up to 20 hours again. my second semester was studying abroad and OSAP gave me just over $5,000. that was enough to cover tuition; but not the $10,000 extra and spending money to study abroad. i also received a bursary for going away -- but i think it was $200. maybe it was $500. i don't really remember. it's a good thing i had saved up quite a bit of money to reward myself with going away even during the recession.
upon return from my adventures of studying in new zealand, i picked up a job that guaranteed me full-time/overtime hours in the peak of summer. i was making a shit ton of money and living at home. i had 3.5 credits remaining in order to graduate in 2010/2011. 3.5 credits was still considered a full course load and i could have applied for OSAP, but i refused. they would have given me more money this time for sure as i was now independent of my parents, but still living at home for the year. i told OSAP to fuck off for the year and enjoyed my shit ton of money saved from the summer/whatever was left from paying a smaller tuition for not that many credits and sailed in spending money from my 20 hours a week part-time job.
2011/2012, i began my postgrad living in toronto, completely independent of my parents and making something ridiculous like less than $2,000 over the course of the summer. OSAP was my only option; and they gave me less than $12,000 to help with tuition, books, rent, and food. it was a great thing that i saved up practically all the money i made from the previous year working and kept my expenses to a minimum. i paid my full first semester tuition in june without any help from OSAP yet as my funding had yet to be released until september. OSAP helped with the second semester tuition and has been covering my rent most months.
i guess the most exciting thing about applying for OSAP are the surprises you never know about, such as the textbook and technology grant of $150. yep, sent to me almost by the time first semester had ended, it kept me drunk and fed for a few days. or for instance, the email i just received from seneca, telling me that i was selected as the recipient for the ontario student access guarantee bursary. how and why i'm still sort of confused about.. but an extra $800 will help me with next month's rent for sure. i don't remember filling in any application for something like this. i really hope it's not a mistake.
and hey, is that a GST cheque i see in my bank account already?
2012, you're starting to redeem yourself already.
with all the talk about the recent tuition grants put forth by the government and terrible advertising such as this particular video, i was upset and frustrated to find out that i'm ineligible for the grant. but, who's eligible for the grant?
well, if you are dependent on your parents, your parents make less than $160,000, you are in good academic standing, and you're from ontario. who's ineligible? everyone listed here and over 500,000 post-secondary students across ontario. grad students, part-time students, international students, law, medicine, dentistry, pharmacy, optometry, and education students are all shit out of of luck on this tuition grant.
yeah. i graduated high school in 2006. it's now 2012. i would hope that i wouldn't be dependent on my parents by now. but, here's where OSAP fucked me over -- i didn't work in high school, in fact, i didn't have my first job until 2007. i had applied for OSAP in my first year of my undergrad and my parents 'made too much money'. and even though i was living on residence and had zero moneys for anything, they gave me just under $2,000 that year. my parents at the time were supporting 2 children for post-secondary education and were definitely not making 'too much' money to support their children and live a comfortable life.
i didn't bother applying for 2007/2008. i had made almost enough working during the summer (back when minimum wage was $8.25) to afford the costs of my tuition but no where close to my residence fees. i worked during this year and saved up some money. in the summer of 2008, i couldn't land a well-paying job and only occasionally worked weekends at a camp on call for 2 months. so i had applied to OSAP for 2008/2009. this time, they gave me just over $2,000. again, not nearly enough to cover tuition or residence fees. i didn't have that much money in the bank, but i was now working just under 20 hours a week during the school year. my parents didn't make that much money, in fact, they made even less that year, and they still had to support 2 children in post-secondary education.
i had a part-time job during the summer of 2009 and a full-time job for just over a month. my bank account was starting to grow. in 2009/2010, OSAP decided to be sort of nice to me since i had stayed in school and used them twice before. i was living at home for first semester and working up to 20 hours again. my second semester was studying abroad and OSAP gave me just over $5,000. that was enough to cover tuition; but not the $10,000 extra and spending money to study abroad. i also received a bursary for going away -- but i think it was $200. maybe it was $500. i don't really remember. it's a good thing i had saved up quite a bit of money to reward myself with going away even during the recession.
upon return from my adventures of studying in new zealand, i picked up a job that guaranteed me full-time/overtime hours in the peak of summer. i was making a shit ton of money and living at home. i had 3.5 credits remaining in order to graduate in 2010/2011. 3.5 credits was still considered a full course load and i could have applied for OSAP, but i refused. they would have given me more money this time for sure as i was now independent of my parents, but still living at home for the year. i told OSAP to fuck off for the year and enjoyed my shit ton of money saved from the summer/whatever was left from paying a smaller tuition for not that many credits and sailed in spending money from my 20 hours a week part-time job.
2011/2012, i began my postgrad living in toronto, completely independent of my parents and making something ridiculous like less than $2,000 over the course of the summer. OSAP was my only option; and they gave me less than $12,000 to help with tuition, books, rent, and food. it was a great thing that i saved up practically all the money i made from the previous year working and kept my expenses to a minimum. i paid my full first semester tuition in june without any help from OSAP yet as my funding had yet to be released until september. OSAP helped with the second semester tuition and has been covering my rent most months.
i guess the most exciting thing about applying for OSAP are the surprises you never know about, such as the textbook and technology grant of $150. yep, sent to me almost by the time first semester had ended, it kept me drunk and fed for a few days. or for instance, the email i just received from seneca, telling me that i was selected as the recipient for the ontario student access guarantee bursary. how and why i'm still sort of confused about.. but an extra $800 will help me with next month's rent for sure. i don't remember filling in any application for something like this. i really hope it's not a mistake.
and hey, is that a GST cheque i see in my bank account already?
2012, you're starting to redeem yourself already.
Jan 4, 2012
resolution
i have a tendency to make the same resolutions year after year. but they aren't those generic resolutions to eat better, lose weight, or work out more (which, are all related and let's face it; i don't really need to do any of those things).
no, my resolutions are of a different kind suited to my inner well-being rather than the exterior. and if i can simplify my resolution into two words:
better decision-making.
2011 was a rough year in any and almost all of the decisions i made. many were life-changing. many were wrong. and many were decisions i can never take back. but there was an upside to several of my decisions on occasion, so not everything was as bad as i'm making it out to be. in fact, i know exactly when things began to take a turn for the worst and pretty much just spiraled out of control. there were too many months where i felt as though i had reverted back to my 15 year old self through decisions that were made.
and hey, i loved my 15 year old self. just not enough to go back to it again.
generally, i'm a pretty fucking happy girl. i don't focus on negatives. i manage my stress effectively. i don't really shut people out and tend to give second chances when i probably shouldn't. i don't say a lot of mean things without sarcasm and hell, i love my friends and family to death. but my decision-making could always be better. and, i'll be honest: i was hurt more times than i can count in 2011.
a rejection from niagara meant i had no future; but opened up the scrambled possibility of moving to toronto and going to seneca.
i lost friends due to reasons beyond my control; but gained new ones (albeit who knows how much better some of them are).
i successfully ruined my longest relationship on more than one occasion; and well, i'm still waiting for the positive yang to my yin on this one.
2011 definitely overstayed its welcome.
here's to the new year:
- to keeping healthy;
- to being active;
- for good times with family and friends;
- for a better relationship to find me when the time is right; and
- to better, all around decision-making on my part.
cheers to 2012.
no, my resolutions are of a different kind suited to my inner well-being rather than the exterior. and if i can simplify my resolution into two words:
better decision-making.
2011 was a rough year in any and almost all of the decisions i made. many were life-changing. many were wrong. and many were decisions i can never take back. but there was an upside to several of my decisions on occasion, so not everything was as bad as i'm making it out to be. in fact, i know exactly when things began to take a turn for the worst and pretty much just spiraled out of control. there were too many months where i felt as though i had reverted back to my 15 year old self through decisions that were made.
and hey, i loved my 15 year old self. just not enough to go back to it again.
generally, i'm a pretty fucking happy girl. i don't focus on negatives. i manage my stress effectively. i don't really shut people out and tend to give second chances when i probably shouldn't. i don't say a lot of mean things without sarcasm and hell, i love my friends and family to death. but my decision-making could always be better. and, i'll be honest: i was hurt more times than i can count in 2011.
a rejection from niagara meant i had no future; but opened up the scrambled possibility of moving to toronto and going to seneca.
i lost friends due to reasons beyond my control; but gained new ones (albeit who knows how much better some of them are).
i successfully ruined my longest relationship on more than one occasion; and well, i'm still waiting for the positive yang to my yin on this one.
2011 definitely overstayed its welcome.
here's to the new year:
- to keeping healthy;
- to being active;
- for good times with family and friends;
- for a better relationship to find me when the time is right; and
- to better, all around decision-making on my part.
cheers to 2012.
Dec 26, 2011
semester in review
it took about four months and the night before my project management exam to finally learn how to calculate net present value, earned value, and the critical path method. and it was all thanks to a dude in my program and youtube's SirGanttAlot.
somehow, i figure if i'm learning more from youtube than the education i'm paying for, there might be a serious problem. i was rewarded today with my results and i'm pretty happy; ending with a C+ in project management is what i needed to achieve in order to stay in the program. of course, everything else was fine: B in law, B+ in environmental management, A in business, and A+ in english. yes, postgrad is a bit of a joke. i can only hope that it stays that way for next semester.
shit, did i really just finish my first four months and first semester in toronto already?
i've been home for the holidays since tuesday afternoon and i've likely spent more time with friends than my actual family. everyone was around for christmas dinner and opening gifts; i'm excited to play the new batman soon. i had to make a decision whether i should bring all my dirty clothes home or my xbox. i think i made the right decision.
i'm heading back to toronto on wednesday and figuring out something to do for new years eve but i don't know what that will be yet. school starts back up january 9th -- my schedule currently shows 3 more 8am classes. i'm very unhappy. nobody knows what's happening with the internship yet. they didn't tell us anything before we left, so i hope it's all sorted out by the time we get back.
i'm also thinking about applying to seneca's green business management postgrad program for september 2012. it looks more interesting than what i'm doing currently; more of a focus on the environment and sustainability plus an internship that seems to be much more organized than my program too. and it costs less. and it'll mean living in toronto for another year.
i'll go talk to them once i get back in january. originally, i was gonna go talk to someone after my last exam... but.. y'know.. i kinda started drinking at 11am when my exam finished. i figured it was a better use of my time.
happy holidays!
"so have a merry christmas, happy channukah, kwazy kwanza, a tip top tet, and a solemn, dignified ramadan.
..and now a word from my god; our sponsor."
somehow, i figure if i'm learning more from youtube than the education i'm paying for, there might be a serious problem. i was rewarded today with my results and i'm pretty happy; ending with a C+ in project management is what i needed to achieve in order to stay in the program. of course, everything else was fine: B in law, B+ in environmental management, A in business, and A+ in english. yes, postgrad is a bit of a joke. i can only hope that it stays that way for next semester.
shit, did i really just finish my first four months and first semester in toronto already?
i've been home for the holidays since tuesday afternoon and i've likely spent more time with friends than my actual family. everyone was around for christmas dinner and opening gifts; i'm excited to play the new batman soon. i had to make a decision whether i should bring all my dirty clothes home or my xbox. i think i made the right decision.
i'm heading back to toronto on wednesday and figuring out something to do for new years eve but i don't know what that will be yet. school starts back up january 9th -- my schedule currently shows 3 more 8am classes. i'm very unhappy. nobody knows what's happening with the internship yet. they didn't tell us anything before we left, so i hope it's all sorted out by the time we get back.
i'm also thinking about applying to seneca's green business management postgrad program for september 2012. it looks more interesting than what i'm doing currently; more of a focus on the environment and sustainability plus an internship that seems to be much more organized than my program too. and it costs less. and it'll mean living in toronto for another year.
i'll go talk to them once i get back in january. originally, i was gonna go talk to someone after my last exam... but.. y'know.. i kinda started drinking at 11am when my exam finished. i figured it was a better use of my time.
happy holidays!
"so have a merry christmas, happy channukah, kwazy kwanza, a tip top tet, and a solemn, dignified ramadan.
..and now a word from my god; our sponsor."
Dec 11, 2011
living with stress
i've always felt i have the ability to manage my stress pretty effectively.
but that's probably only because it's in my nature to let all my stress build up to a point of no return. and with the amount of things i've had to face this semester between school and living here, it's beginning to get the best of me now that it's exam time.
several things happened yesterday that made me feel rather uncomfortable:
1. corey found a mouse in our garbage
now, i'll admit that sometimes our kitchen is not the cleanest. bur our garbage doesn't normally pile up or be left for significant periods of time. it rarely smells. and we keep all our recyclables on the island until someone decides to take them out. so where the fuck did this mouse come from?
well, it could be from the number of our interior/exterior doors that don't close properly. the little fucker could have came in through any one of them. corey was emptying the garbage last night and the mouse jumped out at him. it ran somewhere, either behind the stove or dishwasher. we don't know. there was so much mouse shit behind the garbage. now i'm more afraid that i'm going to get a late night mousey visitor while i'm asleep. we have moved our garbage from underneath the sink to the island counter in hopes that charles will leave our apartment. perhaps we may even catch him and keep him as a pet?
2. water dripping from the bathroom vent
last night, there was this constant stream of water/pee flowing from the bathroom ceiling vent for a good... ten to fifteen minutes. luckily, the bathroom vent is mostly over the toilet; so the majority of the water/pee was going into the toilet. we're not sure why this was happening but eventually it did stop.
3. bathroom ceiling starting to bend
this may be connected to the water dripping from the bathroom vent, but the ceiling around the vent is beginning to curve and bend, like what happens when there is water damage to a wall. it's been getting worse over the last few months.
again, i'm sure this has something to do with the renovations upstairs... but i still constantly hear people doing things.. like living and not renovating during the evening hours. i wonder what's actually happening up there.
4. full garbage chutes
the superintendent seems to disappear on weekends and is 'off duty'. this causes problems in the use of our garbage chute on the floor. it gets backed up to an insane degree and is not always resolved by monday morning. my neighbours either need to learn how to use a chute properly (and keep their recyclables like a normal person) or the garbage needs to be emptied on a daily basis, even on the weekend.
those are just my apartment troubles from last night.
my exam stress is 4 exams in 3 days, and a 5th exam on the 5th day. with the two most difficult on wednesday. my bigger problem is my professor who teaches two of my classes this semester who thinks that:
1. it's alright to fail me on the midterm by two marks and tell me he wouldn't look at it again.
2. it's alright to insult me by saying my handwriting is illegible (but yet, nobody in the class can ever read his writing).
3. it's alright to circle words on my midterm that he didn't agree with but mean the same thing and giving me zero or half marks.
it's not as if i asked to be on his bad side; i attended class and participated. i did well on quizzes and assignments... for the most part. if i can get an almost 90 in the multiple choice section of the midterm; fail the short answer section that is based off of the multiple choice questions because he "couldn't read my writing" or didn't agree with the words i used to describe my short answers; and bomb the problems section of the midterm.. there's seriously an issue with his marking and teaching. and when 95% of the class needs to approach the prof after the midterm to discuss marks... it is definitely not a student problem.
i need to at least pass his exam on wednesday in order to make sure i'll pass the course (despite passing and doing well on everything else in his class). so, i'm a bit stressed over that. but i'm studying. i just hope i won't freeze up wednesday morning.
tomorrow: open book law exam.
tuesday: ridiculously easy english exam.
wednesday: project managamenet exam (need to pass); business exam (study and i'll be fine).
friday: EMS exam (would appreciate doing better on the exam than the midterm.. but who knows with that prof).
is it friday at 10:30am yet?
but that's probably only because it's in my nature to let all my stress build up to a point of no return. and with the amount of things i've had to face this semester between school and living here, it's beginning to get the best of me now that it's exam time.
several things happened yesterday that made me feel rather uncomfortable:
1. corey found a mouse in our garbage
now, i'll admit that sometimes our kitchen is not the cleanest. bur our garbage doesn't normally pile up or be left for significant periods of time. it rarely smells. and we keep all our recyclables on the island until someone decides to take them out. so where the fuck did this mouse come from?
well, it could be from the number of our interior/exterior doors that don't close properly. the little fucker could have came in through any one of them. corey was emptying the garbage last night and the mouse jumped out at him. it ran somewhere, either behind the stove or dishwasher. we don't know. there was so much mouse shit behind the garbage. now i'm more afraid that i'm going to get a late night mousey visitor while i'm asleep. we have moved our garbage from underneath the sink to the island counter in hopes that charles will leave our apartment. perhaps we may even catch him and keep him as a pet?
2. water dripping from the bathroom vent
last night, there was this constant stream of water/pee flowing from the bathroom ceiling vent for a good... ten to fifteen minutes. luckily, the bathroom vent is mostly over the toilet; so the majority of the water/pee was going into the toilet. we're not sure why this was happening but eventually it did stop.
3. bathroom ceiling starting to bend
this may be connected to the water dripping from the bathroom vent, but the ceiling around the vent is beginning to curve and bend, like what happens when there is water damage to a wall. it's been getting worse over the last few months.
again, i'm sure this has something to do with the renovations upstairs... but i still constantly hear people doing things.. like living and not renovating during the evening hours. i wonder what's actually happening up there.
4. full garbage chutes
the superintendent seems to disappear on weekends and is 'off duty'. this causes problems in the use of our garbage chute on the floor. it gets backed up to an insane degree and is not always resolved by monday morning. my neighbours either need to learn how to use a chute properly (and keep their recyclables like a normal person) or the garbage needs to be emptied on a daily basis, even on the weekend.
those are just my apartment troubles from last night.
my exam stress is 4 exams in 3 days, and a 5th exam on the 5th day. with the two most difficult on wednesday. my bigger problem is my professor who teaches two of my classes this semester who thinks that:
1. it's alright to fail me on the midterm by two marks and tell me he wouldn't look at it again.
2. it's alright to insult me by saying my handwriting is illegible (but yet, nobody in the class can ever read his writing).
3. it's alright to circle words on my midterm that he didn't agree with but mean the same thing and giving me zero or half marks.
it's not as if i asked to be on his bad side; i attended class and participated. i did well on quizzes and assignments... for the most part. if i can get an almost 90 in the multiple choice section of the midterm; fail the short answer section that is based off of the multiple choice questions because he "couldn't read my writing" or didn't agree with the words i used to describe my short answers; and bomb the problems section of the midterm.. there's seriously an issue with his marking and teaching. and when 95% of the class needs to approach the prof after the midterm to discuss marks... it is definitely not a student problem.
i need to at least pass his exam on wednesday in order to make sure i'll pass the course (despite passing and doing well on everything else in his class). so, i'm a bit stressed over that. but i'm studying. i just hope i won't freeze up wednesday morning.
tomorrow: open book law exam.
tuesday: ridiculously easy english exam.
wednesday: project managamenet exam (need to pass); business exam (study and i'll be fine).
friday: EMS exam (would appreciate doing better on the exam than the midterm.. but who knows with that prof).
is it friday at 10:30am yet?
Nov 18, 2011
apartment trouble
if someone asked me what the three integral components of a 'good' apartment would be, i'd tell them that it's:
1) location;
2) location and;
3) fuck, i don't even know what the third is because i can't focus with all this fucking drilling.
it started off back in september when they decided to renovate both the apartment below me and down the hall from me. they were hammering and drilling constantly. and the sound of people dropping things. the amount of times i heard something drop was ridiculous. the times of renovations seemed to vary -- usually between before 8am but never after 8pm. yes. 12 hours of drilling. this went on for days, weeks, and then months. it got to a point where i had tuned it out completely. or so i thought.
and then -- all of a sudden -- i didn't have to tune it out anymore. it had stopped. i slept well for close to a week. well, for the week that i didn't hear the crazy man outside screaming profanities at 4am. yesterday, the drilling started again. it woke me up before 9am on my day to sleep in. this time, it was from above me. now, i was certain there were people living up there for the last 2 months. i've heard them arguing and dropping shit. i 'veheard an animal -- cat or dog -- running around. i may have also heard them having sex; but that could have been the apartments next to me.
i understand that renovations are a great thing. hell, our apartment looks awesome. but the 12 hours of drilling gives me a headache. i try to drown it out with music. sometimes, i'm successful. other times, i'll leave my apartment to go to school and the drilling will just be in my head. it doesn't seem to matter where i am in the apartment too, but the majority of the drilling seems to take place above my room; the place where i'm supposed to get the most done.
over reading week, i locked myself in my apartment in order to study and write my assignments for two days. i'm surprised at the marks i received on those assignments since it was so difficult to concentrate while they renovated the places next to me and below me. i imagine that several of my sentences had coherent thoughts followed by a string of durrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
many of these renovation woes also shut off my water for hours without any warning. i believe it was 4 days in october and so far, twice in november. luckily, i was never home for the 2 days this month -- or perhaps i was and i just didn't need water. i mean, i'm by no means a shut in (despite what needed to be done over reading week) but like most people, i enjoy being home and hanging out. i get work done here. distractions are usually minimal. the internet works unlike the internet at school. yet... with the constant drilling, being focused is a serious problem. and there is so much work to be done in the coming weeks.
at least there are 2 days on the weekend when the drilling stops. i just need toronto to shut up on weekends so i can get some sleep.
cue the wubwubwubwubwub at the loudest possible volume. fuck you, renovators!
1) location;
2) location and;
3) fuck, i don't even know what the third is because i can't focus with all this fucking drilling.
it started off back in september when they decided to renovate both the apartment below me and down the hall from me. they were hammering and drilling constantly. and the sound of people dropping things. the amount of times i heard something drop was ridiculous. the times of renovations seemed to vary -- usually between before 8am but never after 8pm. yes. 12 hours of drilling. this went on for days, weeks, and then months. it got to a point where i had tuned it out completely. or so i thought.
and then -- all of a sudden -- i didn't have to tune it out anymore. it had stopped. i slept well for close to a week. well, for the week that i didn't hear the crazy man outside screaming profanities at 4am. yesterday, the drilling started again. it woke me up before 9am on my day to sleep in. this time, it was from above me. now, i was certain there were people living up there for the last 2 months. i've heard them arguing and dropping shit. i 'veheard an animal -- cat or dog -- running around. i may have also heard them having sex; but that could have been the apartments next to me.
i understand that renovations are a great thing. hell, our apartment looks awesome. but the 12 hours of drilling gives me a headache. i try to drown it out with music. sometimes, i'm successful. other times, i'll leave my apartment to go to school and the drilling will just be in my head. it doesn't seem to matter where i am in the apartment too, but the majority of the drilling seems to take place above my room; the place where i'm supposed to get the most done.
over reading week, i locked myself in my apartment in order to study and write my assignments for two days. i'm surprised at the marks i received on those assignments since it was so difficult to concentrate while they renovated the places next to me and below me. i imagine that several of my sentences had coherent thoughts followed by a string of durrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
many of these renovation woes also shut off my water for hours without any warning. i believe it was 4 days in october and so far, twice in november. luckily, i was never home for the 2 days this month -- or perhaps i was and i just didn't need water. i mean, i'm by no means a shut in (despite what needed to be done over reading week) but like most people, i enjoy being home and hanging out. i get work done here. distractions are usually minimal. the internet works unlike the internet at school. yet... with the constant drilling, being focused is a serious problem. and there is so much work to be done in the coming weeks.
at least there are 2 days on the weekend when the drilling stops. i just need toronto to shut up on weekends so i can get some sleep.
cue the wubwubwubwubwub at the loudest possible volume. fuck you, renovators!
Nov 8, 2011
what if
sometimes i wonder if i made the right choice.
i guess it really wasn't my choice to make. with the rejection from niagara and that being the only school i applied to for a post-grad, i was scrambling for something better. but it made me wonder and showed that it was almost fate that i didn't get in.
let's face it: 8 months at niagara would mean 8 more months of living at home and i definitely would not have been able to stand that. i doubt i would be learning anything about project management or getting 100% on assignments (okay, i don't know about the latter). still, i love every aspect of city life. the nightlife, the closeness, the transportation, the friends, the accessibility, and being on my own for sure rules.
i just imagine how things would be different if i didn't scramble to apply to seneca and get in -- even though it wasn't exactly what i wanted. but it's now shaping up to be something that could be beneficial to me in the long run.
i realized how different college life and university life are -- both through the atmosphere and the teaching/grading styles. yes, i'm post-grad, but fuck, if it's 8am and i just got up at 6am, i should have every right to show up in trackpants. fuck all of you for thinking otherwise. and the midterms. oh god, the midterms. i've written 4 so far with a 5th tomorrow. i fucking hate midterms. i didn't have any in my final year of university; i think the last time was in my 4th year. oh yeah, and what happened on that midterm? i scored 100% on short answer and essay questions. yeah. it was a good way to end my university midterm career. this also goes with final exams too -- i only had one final exam in my last year at brock and i did quite well.
i guess i'm just not a fan of testing. my memory, she ain't what she used to be and i find myself blanking on questions i should know... but don't. i prefer writing papers in order to collect my thoughts and ideas and apply them accordingly -- 'cause hell, i can express myself and argue my opinions pretty well! this seems no different in the marks i get from papers/reports/assignments so far. but, even my test scores are turning around. it's all just a matter of my focus at the time. if my mind is elsewhere (and it tends to be), i'm gonna do terrible. but if it's not, i'll more than likely be successful. hell week and a half is winding down to a close tomorrow and it's pretty much smooth sailing with only a few assignments to complete before final exams.
this seneca post-grad or a niagara post-grad was not what i intended. it's no applied master's, but it's going to have to work out.. for now. i just don't enjoy this all theory with no action thing. i want action with less theory!
i guess it really wasn't my choice to make. with the rejection from niagara and that being the only school i applied to for a post-grad, i was scrambling for something better. but it made me wonder and showed that it was almost fate that i didn't get in.
let's face it: 8 months at niagara would mean 8 more months of living at home and i definitely would not have been able to stand that. i doubt i would be learning anything about project management or getting 100% on assignments (okay, i don't know about the latter). still, i love every aspect of city life. the nightlife, the closeness, the transportation, the friends, the accessibility, and being on my own for sure rules.
i just imagine how things would be different if i didn't scramble to apply to seneca and get in -- even though it wasn't exactly what i wanted. but it's now shaping up to be something that could be beneficial to me in the long run.
i realized how different college life and university life are -- both through the atmosphere and the teaching/grading styles. yes, i'm post-grad, but fuck, if it's 8am and i just got up at 6am, i should have every right to show up in trackpants. fuck all of you for thinking otherwise. and the midterms. oh god, the midterms. i've written 4 so far with a 5th tomorrow. i fucking hate midterms. i didn't have any in my final year of university; i think the last time was in my 4th year. oh yeah, and what happened on that midterm? i scored 100% on short answer and essay questions. yeah. it was a good way to end my university midterm career. this also goes with final exams too -- i only had one final exam in my last year at brock and i did quite well.
i guess i'm just not a fan of testing. my memory, she ain't what she used to be and i find myself blanking on questions i should know... but don't. i prefer writing papers in order to collect my thoughts and ideas and apply them accordingly -- 'cause hell, i can express myself and argue my opinions pretty well! this seems no different in the marks i get from papers/reports/assignments so far. but, even my test scores are turning around. it's all just a matter of my focus at the time. if my mind is elsewhere (and it tends to be), i'm gonna do terrible. but if it's not, i'll more than likely be successful. hell week and a half is winding down to a close tomorrow and it's pretty much smooth sailing with only a few assignments to complete before final exams.
this seneca post-grad or a niagara post-grad was not what i intended. it's no applied master's, but it's going to have to work out.. for now. i just don't enjoy this all theory with no action thing. i want action with less theory!
Oct 11, 2011
MIA
you may have noticed a lack of blog updates the past 2 weeks.
never fear, i am still alive and kickin'. things have just been so busy. i'm not even sure if busy is the right word here.
i went out for samson's birthday dinner on september 29th at kokoni. the sushi was great. too bad i was starving before i got there and had to grab a sub. it felt weird to be the only girl.. and the only straight person. it had been a very long time since the last time i noticed that conundrum. the 30th, i wrote my second assignment -- an internal memo. we had a meeting with the program coordinator to discuss things about the internship. these meetings will be every couple of weeks now. i'm looking forward to securing a placement and getting the experience of actually doing something outside of class and theory. i went to samson's party for a little bit then came home to do some work for the week ahead.
october 1st, i went with heather in the afternoon to wal-mart (ugh) to help her buy glasses. i stopped in at toys r' us looking for the possibility of really cool halo lego like i saw in sears (again, ugh) way back when but found nothing cool. instead, i came across fable 3 for 15 bucks. yeah, i just HAD to get it. we met up later for my first nuit blache experience. i saw lots of people throughout the night and a number of different pieces of artwork. only like 3 of them were really interesting. it was a cold night and eventually we stopped for late-night breakfast. i managed to stay out until almost 5am. i don't think i would ever go to nuit blanche again.
october 2nd, i rested up during the day and wrote my proposal for environmental law that wasn't for marks. we also had an open book quiz set for october 3... also, not for marks. i didn't understand the logic behind any of this no grades stuff.
october 4th, steph came up, i began my first day of skipping class, and my first day volunteering for the greenbuild conference. we went to check out the green job fair early but it wasn't what we thought it was going to be, so we hung out doing nothing for awhile until our volunteer shift started at 2pm. we worked one of the speaker series doing crowd control, crowd control for the opening plenary, and had an hour on a recycling station. we headed to east side marios for some dinner and home to unwind.
october 5th, we were up bright and early to catch speakers at 8:30am. i saw one about green schools that teach and another on sustainable campus planning/ecodistricts. all superb. we got our free lunch (meh, wasn't that great) and started our second volunteer shift at 2:30pm; recycling stations for 4 hours. the time just dragged. eventually, we got to leave sometime after 6pm. we received free tickets to the speakers/maroon 5 concert at ACC that evening, but i didn't feel much like going, needed to study for my quiz the next day, and steph had to go home. i gave the tickets to bobby and his friend instead. they had a good time, i hope.
october 6th was my 23rd birthday, though it didn't feel like it for most of the day. i went to another speaker series; one about climate change plans for university of bc and calgary and one about re-skinning and sustainable buildings. again, they were fantastic. i grabbed my free lunch (much better this time) and came home to shower and study. however, there was no water in my building. so i was a smelly birthday girl. i went to class and was greeted with happy birthdays (which made it feel like my birthday again), wrote the quiz, stuck around for lecture, then met up with steve to go to my birthday dinner festivities at joeys eaton centre. it was nice to see everyone and get free dessert. steve, heather, and i went out after for more drinks. it was a good and bad idea.
i made it home and passed out only to awake again after 6am and knew for sure i would be late to class. that is, if the ttc would have cooperated normally. there were super long delays and then i had to change trains at sheppard because there was something wrong with the train i was on. eventually, i made it to class, wrote what i thought would be the shittiest 'bad news' letter and got my memo back from last week -- 100%! i met up with my group after class to discuss our project due the tuesday after thanksgiving weekend. originally, i had planned to take the 3pm bus home to niagara falls. i decided to wait it out and take the 7:30pm bus, except it was so busy that it was close to 8:30pm before i even got on a bus.
it was nice to see the parents over the weekend and eat lots of turkey. the weekend was definitely not long enough. my parents drove me back monday afternoon (while i snagged the 42" tv which looks amazing in our living room) with a stop at ball's falls for their thanksgiving festival and to see the conservation centre. i was back on the grind this morning at 6am for class at 8am.
i've been saving up for an amazing blog post in the works that will soon be ready for publishing. so, don't feel bad if you don't find my daily life to be that exciting.
never fear, i am still alive and kickin'. things have just been so busy. i'm not even sure if busy is the right word here.
i went out for samson's birthday dinner on september 29th at kokoni. the sushi was great. too bad i was starving before i got there and had to grab a sub. it felt weird to be the only girl.. and the only straight person. it had been a very long time since the last time i noticed that conundrum. the 30th, i wrote my second assignment -- an internal memo. we had a meeting with the program coordinator to discuss things about the internship. these meetings will be every couple of weeks now. i'm looking forward to securing a placement and getting the experience of actually doing something outside of class and theory. i went to samson's party for a little bit then came home to do some work for the week ahead.
october 1st, i went with heather in the afternoon to wal-mart (ugh) to help her buy glasses. i stopped in at toys r' us looking for the possibility of really cool halo lego like i saw in sears (again, ugh) way back when but found nothing cool. instead, i came across fable 3 for 15 bucks. yeah, i just HAD to get it. we met up later for my first nuit blache experience. i saw lots of people throughout the night and a number of different pieces of artwork. only like 3 of them were really interesting. it was a cold night and eventually we stopped for late-night breakfast. i managed to stay out until almost 5am. i don't think i would ever go to nuit blanche again.
october 2nd, i rested up during the day and wrote my proposal for environmental law that wasn't for marks. we also had an open book quiz set for october 3... also, not for marks. i didn't understand the logic behind any of this no grades stuff.
october 4th, steph came up, i began my first day of skipping class, and my first day volunteering for the greenbuild conference. we went to check out the green job fair early but it wasn't what we thought it was going to be, so we hung out doing nothing for awhile until our volunteer shift started at 2pm. we worked one of the speaker series doing crowd control, crowd control for the opening plenary, and had an hour on a recycling station. we headed to east side marios for some dinner and home to unwind.
october 5th, we were up bright and early to catch speakers at 8:30am. i saw one about green schools that teach and another on sustainable campus planning/ecodistricts. all superb. we got our free lunch (meh, wasn't that great) and started our second volunteer shift at 2:30pm; recycling stations for 4 hours. the time just dragged. eventually, we got to leave sometime after 6pm. we received free tickets to the speakers/maroon 5 concert at ACC that evening, but i didn't feel much like going, needed to study for my quiz the next day, and steph had to go home. i gave the tickets to bobby and his friend instead. they had a good time, i hope.
october 6th was my 23rd birthday, though it didn't feel like it for most of the day. i went to another speaker series; one about climate change plans for university of bc and calgary and one about re-skinning and sustainable buildings. again, they were fantastic. i grabbed my free lunch (much better this time) and came home to shower and study. however, there was no water in my building. so i was a smelly birthday girl. i went to class and was greeted with happy birthdays (which made it feel like my birthday again), wrote the quiz, stuck around for lecture, then met up with steve to go to my birthday dinner festivities at joeys eaton centre. it was nice to see everyone and get free dessert. steve, heather, and i went out after for more drinks. it was a good and bad idea.
i made it home and passed out only to awake again after 6am and knew for sure i would be late to class. that is, if the ttc would have cooperated normally. there were super long delays and then i had to change trains at sheppard because there was something wrong with the train i was on. eventually, i made it to class, wrote what i thought would be the shittiest 'bad news' letter and got my memo back from last week -- 100%! i met up with my group after class to discuss our project due the tuesday after thanksgiving weekend. originally, i had planned to take the 3pm bus home to niagara falls. i decided to wait it out and take the 7:30pm bus, except it was so busy that it was close to 8:30pm before i even got on a bus.
it was nice to see the parents over the weekend and eat lots of turkey. the weekend was definitely not long enough. my parents drove me back monday afternoon (while i snagged the 42" tv which looks amazing in our living room) with a stop at ball's falls for their thanksgiving festival and to see the conservation centre. i was back on the grind this morning at 6am for class at 8am.
i've been saving up for an amazing blog post in the works that will soon be ready for publishing. so, don't feel bad if you don't find my daily life to be that exciting.
Sep 26, 2011
first assignment
it took 3 weeks to start and finish my first grad school assignment.
unfortunately, the assignment was a joke -- an email message worth 10%. it was almost too easy. but it was for my ridiculous technical writing class. i assume that everything will be just that easy.
sunday, i hit up wayne gretzky's for their caesar special and wings. monday, i had late class and was picked on for an answer from the readings that i did read but i didn't have much of a clue what it was that i read in environmental law. i was quick to react and answered accordingly. i was only picked on once, thankfully.
tuesday, i checked out a speaker from u of t's disorientation week. i saw dr. sunera thobani and her reflections on the tenth anniversary of september 11th. it was profound and gave me a lot to think about. i was happy i went. i also picked up some groceries and used them throughout the week (for my sake, they were milk, orange juice, pork and veggie dumplings, shrimp, a spanish onion, and bananas.)
thursday after class, i met up with tyler for dinner and we went to the firkin on church. it was good to hang for a bit and unwind. i awoke friday morning as per the normal time, 6am, to be in class by 8am, only to find that via text that my class was cancelled. except that i was already on the bus to school by the time i found out. so... i had 3 hours to kill. but so did a bunch of other people in my program and steve and his friend joined us eventually as well because their prof was an hour late for class. we played cards and hung out while we all wished we were still in bed rather than at school.
friday evening, i went out to the labryinth and the barn for the homohop. the lab was neat. i might go back at some point. i pretty much only stayed for one drink at the barn. sorry, corey! at least i made an appearance. saturday afternoon, i met up with steve to go to mod club for misery signals. we stuck around for structures and headed to sneaky dee's for nachos. we headed back in time for misery signals and after the burial, who played with 2 8 string guitars for the majority of the set. it was unreal.
after the show, we walked over to einsteins and ran into heather and jackie; a nice surprise! we drank cheap pitchers long into the night and stopped at mcdonalds as per usual. i can see myself going back there sometime too. yesterday afternoon, i completed that assignment we were to do on friday but class was cancelled and made perogies for dinner.
saturday will be my first nuit blanche! ....if i end up going to it, that is. let's make a plan, friends!
unfortunately, the assignment was a joke -- an email message worth 10%. it was almost too easy. but it was for my ridiculous technical writing class. i assume that everything will be just that easy.
sunday, i hit up wayne gretzky's for their caesar special and wings. monday, i had late class and was picked on for an answer from the readings that i did read but i didn't have much of a clue what it was that i read in environmental law. i was quick to react and answered accordingly. i was only picked on once, thankfully.
tuesday, i checked out a speaker from u of t's disorientation week. i saw dr. sunera thobani and her reflections on the tenth anniversary of september 11th. it was profound and gave me a lot to think about. i was happy i went. i also picked up some groceries and used them throughout the week (for my sake, they were milk, orange juice, pork and veggie dumplings, shrimp, a spanish onion, and bananas.)
thursday after class, i met up with tyler for dinner and we went to the firkin on church. it was good to hang for a bit and unwind. i awoke friday morning as per the normal time, 6am, to be in class by 8am, only to find that via text that my class was cancelled. except that i was already on the bus to school by the time i found out. so... i had 3 hours to kill. but so did a bunch of other people in my program and steve and his friend joined us eventually as well because their prof was an hour late for class. we played cards and hung out while we all wished we were still in bed rather than at school.
friday evening, i went out to the labryinth and the barn for the homohop. the lab was neat. i might go back at some point. i pretty much only stayed for one drink at the barn. sorry, corey! at least i made an appearance. saturday afternoon, i met up with steve to go to mod club for misery signals. we stuck around for structures and headed to sneaky dee's for nachos. we headed back in time for misery signals and after the burial, who played with 2 8 string guitars for the majority of the set. it was unreal.
after the show, we walked over to einsteins and ran into heather and jackie; a nice surprise! we drank cheap pitchers long into the night and stopped at mcdonalds as per usual. i can see myself going back there sometime too. yesterday afternoon, i completed that assignment we were to do on friday but class was cancelled and made perogies for dinner.
saturday will be my first nuit blanche! ....if i end up going to it, that is. let's make a plan, friends!
Sep 18, 2011
second thoughts
i'm having second thoughts.
not about living in toronto. fuck, it still rules. mostly about school. it's getting to be beyond an actual joke. rarely am i listening. i find myself daydreaming about everything half the time. my heart (and my mind) just doesn't seem to be into it. i'm hoping that will change soon when i have stuff to do. readings? yeah, whatever. i paid for those books so obviously i'm going to read them. but i don't feel as though i have learned anything yet.
on monday, we had our first environmental law class. besides the teacher being super intense (turn off your phone, picks on classmates at random (and makes fun of their university? ...the fuck), spends most of the 3 hours of class talking about a bunch of case studies but doesn't actually give out a syllabus, i felt like i could learn something from this course. perhaps. i don't know a whole lot about environmental law. but as of a week, i still have no clue what it is we're going to do in that class or what we'll actually learn.
we had to discuss our dream environmental project in the project management class. nobody knew where he wanted us to go with it. i felt really terrible when he yelled at the one lady for not wanting to put up her dream project on the board. she's international; maybe she can't write well? there were a lot of things to consider when she said no. fuck, the teacher was so rude. she ended up leaving. good for her. don't take his fucking shit.
exciting parts of this week: wednesday's snakes and lattes. we played apples to apples, jenga, and formula d. all of which were so cool. that place is wicked. i won a round of apples to apples. i haven't played that game in forever. thursday, i had one class. i commuted all the way to school to be in class for an hour and a half instead of 3 hours. i almost felt ripped off, but at least i was home sooner. unfortunately, i had nothing to do that night.
friday morning, i went to that english writing class and wanted to shoot myself. tone, discourse, proper writing techniques to 'get the message across'. ugh. this is the only class that actually kills me and i wish i didn't have to take it. i went out for a few beers friday night to the only cafe and it ruled by serving creemore. i can see myself needing beers every friday after that class.
finally, i'm super stoked to be going to see misery signals next weekend. they played L3 back in second year and it was a fantastic show. here's hoping next week is better than this week. enjoy this clip of one of my favourite songs!
not about living in toronto. fuck, it still rules. mostly about school. it's getting to be beyond an actual joke. rarely am i listening. i find myself daydreaming about everything half the time. my heart (and my mind) just doesn't seem to be into it. i'm hoping that will change soon when i have stuff to do. readings? yeah, whatever. i paid for those books so obviously i'm going to read them. but i don't feel as though i have learned anything yet.
on monday, we had our first environmental law class. besides the teacher being super intense (turn off your phone, picks on classmates at random (and makes fun of their university? ...the fuck), spends most of the 3 hours of class talking about a bunch of case studies but doesn't actually give out a syllabus, i felt like i could learn something from this course. perhaps. i don't know a whole lot about environmental law. but as of a week, i still have no clue what it is we're going to do in that class or what we'll actually learn.
we had to discuss our dream environmental project in the project management class. nobody knew where he wanted us to go with it. i felt really terrible when he yelled at the one lady for not wanting to put up her dream project on the board. she's international; maybe she can't write well? there were a lot of things to consider when she said no. fuck, the teacher was so rude. she ended up leaving. good for her. don't take his fucking shit.
exciting parts of this week: wednesday's snakes and lattes. we played apples to apples, jenga, and formula d. all of which were so cool. that place is wicked. i won a round of apples to apples. i haven't played that game in forever. thursday, i had one class. i commuted all the way to school to be in class for an hour and a half instead of 3 hours. i almost felt ripped off, but at least i was home sooner. unfortunately, i had nothing to do that night.
friday morning, i went to that english writing class and wanted to shoot myself. tone, discourse, proper writing techniques to 'get the message across'. ugh. this is the only class that actually kills me and i wish i didn't have to take it. i went out for a few beers friday night to the only cafe and it ruled by serving creemore. i can see myself needing beers every friday after that class.
finally, i'm super stoked to be going to see misery signals next weekend. they played L3 back in second year and it was a fantastic show. here's hoping next week is better than this week. enjoy this clip of one of my favourite songs!
Sep 11, 2011
first week in toronto
i enjoy toronto immensely but i don't exactly enjoy my commute to school.
i had 2 classes on wednesday, one at 8am and one at 11am. i hate having to be up by 6am in order to make it into class by 8am, though i almost have my commute down to a science now. which is nice, i suppose. my wednesday 8am class is a joke -- pretty much take everything i ever learned from my undergrad and put it into one course -- and there you have my 8am class. then i have a business writing course which is also a joke. entirely similar to a technical writing course i took in my undergrad. and all the assignments are completed in class... at 8am on fridays. god damnit. but i'm getting ahead of myself.
wednesday night, i went out with steve to celebrate our own frosh week. tyler and steve came over. we made perogies and had beers. steve and i went to pegasus on church street and then hoops on yonge, with a late-night stop at mcdonalds. we drunkenly stumbled back to my place and shortly after, corey stumbled in as well and we all hung out for a little while.
thursday, i nursed my hangover and went to school for 4pm and my prof showed up like 20 minutes late because she couldn't find the room (neither could i, damn you seneca and your awful directions/new buildings). the class was business principles and seems like it should be sort of easy. i went with some of the guys from my program to check out the bookstore and found 2 of the textbooks we need -- one at about $60 and the other $90. fuck textbooks. i ate pita pit, headed home, and went to bed early. i was exhausted.
friday, i made it to my 8am class. again, a total joke. we had to write 'tell me about yourself' memos. i made some jokes in mine. i hope she gets them. we had 2 hours to kill before the next class, so 6 of us from the program lazed outside in a green area somewhere on campus and got to know each other. i went home right after the second class (that went on FOREVER), grabbed a sub for lunch, had a quick shower, and met steve at wellesley station. we headed over to u of t and became volunteers for the orientation concert, thanks to corey.
i was stoked. i did front stage security for sam roberts and land of talk. i met sam roberts and KC from degrassi. i got a free poutine and a bunch of other free stuff. i was supposed to help out at guvernment after for the afterparty but i bailed since i was so tired. steve and i left u of t, met up with tyler for a short hangout, then i went home and passed out. it was such a fantastic day.
saturday, i met up with steph and erica at the vegetarian food festival in the afternoon.we ate some real delicious food and enjoyed ourselves in the sun. it was nice to catch up! i took my first streetcar ever. i left harbourfront centre and went over to tyler's, meeting up with juan and adam. tyler made us all some amazing dinner -- then i headed home to get ready. i was back out on the road about an hour later to go to heather's for a predrink before lee's palace. lee's palace/dance cave was sweet and i can foresee me going back there soon.
today, i did a little grocery shopping (bought milk, chocolate milk, raspberries, and orange juice) and only spent $10. i was planning to do laundry but i think i'll save that for tuesday afternoon. gerrad and paul are coming over later to watch the season finale of curb your enthusiasm.
geez, it's been a long week but an excellent week! at least i get to sleep in tomorrow -- class isn't until 1:30pm.
i had 2 classes on wednesday, one at 8am and one at 11am. i hate having to be up by 6am in order to make it into class by 8am, though i almost have my commute down to a science now. which is nice, i suppose. my wednesday 8am class is a joke -- pretty much take everything i ever learned from my undergrad and put it into one course -- and there you have my 8am class. then i have a business writing course which is also a joke. entirely similar to a technical writing course i took in my undergrad. and all the assignments are completed in class... at 8am on fridays. god damnit. but i'm getting ahead of myself.
wednesday night, i went out with steve to celebrate our own frosh week. tyler and steve came over. we made perogies and had beers. steve and i went to pegasus on church street and then hoops on yonge, with a late-night stop at mcdonalds. we drunkenly stumbled back to my place and shortly after, corey stumbled in as well and we all hung out for a little while.
thursday, i nursed my hangover and went to school for 4pm and my prof showed up like 20 minutes late because she couldn't find the room (neither could i, damn you seneca and your awful directions/new buildings). the class was business principles and seems like it should be sort of easy. i went with some of the guys from my program to check out the bookstore and found 2 of the textbooks we need -- one at about $60 and the other $90. fuck textbooks. i ate pita pit, headed home, and went to bed early. i was exhausted.
friday, i made it to my 8am class. again, a total joke. we had to write 'tell me about yourself' memos. i made some jokes in mine. i hope she gets them. we had 2 hours to kill before the next class, so 6 of us from the program lazed outside in a green area somewhere on campus and got to know each other. i went home right after the second class (that went on FOREVER), grabbed a sub for lunch, had a quick shower, and met steve at wellesley station. we headed over to u of t and became volunteers for the orientation concert, thanks to corey.
i was stoked. i did front stage security for sam roberts and land of talk. i met sam roberts and KC from degrassi. i got a free poutine and a bunch of other free stuff. i was supposed to help out at guvernment after for the afterparty but i bailed since i was so tired. steve and i left u of t, met up with tyler for a short hangout, then i went home and passed out. it was such a fantastic day.
saturday, i met up with steph and erica at the vegetarian food festival in the afternoon.we ate some real delicious food and enjoyed ourselves in the sun. it was nice to catch up! i took my first streetcar ever. i left harbourfront centre and went over to tyler's, meeting up with juan and adam. tyler made us all some amazing dinner -- then i headed home to get ready. i was back out on the road about an hour later to go to heather's for a predrink before lee's palace. lee's palace/dance cave was sweet and i can foresee me going back there soon.
today, i did a little grocery shopping (bought milk, chocolate milk, raspberries, and orange juice) and only spent $10. i was planning to do laundry but i think i'll save that for tuesday afternoon. gerrad and paul are coming over later to watch the season finale of curb your enthusiasm.
geez, it's been a long week but an excellent week! at least i get to sleep in tomorrow -- class isn't until 1:30pm.
Sep 6, 2011
first day of grad school
today was my first day of grad school.
i had one class and it started at 8am. which meant that i needed to be up at 6am and out of my apartment before 7am in order to arrive to class on time. and that's not including the ridiculous strike traffic. i rolled out of bed and dreaded the day ahead.
i left around 6:40am and did the zombie walk to the subway. grabbed the subway easily and rode to finch where i just barely made the express bus to school. i made it to school by 7:30am. now i know that i can leave a little later tomorrow when i have to do it all again, and once again on friday. yes, i have 3 8am classes a week. this is not the grad school classes i imagined. hopefully next semester will be better.
it felt strange to be back in the classroom. i looked around and knew nobody. there was a definite age gap in my classmates. where were my TREN girls at? no where. it was depressing. the professor was late so the coordinator took over until he got there. this is when the coordinator told me to switch my one class to the other 8am on friday. i was not happy. class flew by and we didn't do much, similar to most of the first day introductions i've been in before.
i made friends with the two girls next to me who seemed to be remotely my age and i walked with the one over to admissions after class. she had the same problem as me: seneca needed 'proof of degree' from her. admissions opened at 10am and my class got out at 9:50am. the admissions lineup was all the way down the hall and almost around the corner when i got there. seeing as i had really nothing else to do today, i waited. and i waited. and i fucking waited. i waited an hour and 20 minutes to talk to someone. she told me that i needed to send a new transcript and a photocopy of my degree/confirmation of graduation and changed the expiry to the end of september. she told me not to panic. clearly, i was not in panic mode. perhaps i look panicky when i'm awake at 6am.
i headed home shortly after while talking to some of the strike people about their issues and whatnot while waiting for the bus. i like to be informed. the bus at finch going to school when i arrived at finch station had so many people waiting. i was glad to be going the opposite direction. i made it home around 12:30pm with a quick stop in at subway for lunch.
over the weekend, i saw lutzenkirchen, got drunk, and went to the eaton centre. i talked to someone at the eaton centre sport chek about possibly getting a transfer (even though i only worked 2 shifts at the niagara falls one) and she told me to call her on wednesday to figure it all out. in the meantime, i applied to various retail jobs at the mall and am waiting to hear back... if i hear back at all.
i need a good night's sleep.
i had one class and it started at 8am. which meant that i needed to be up at 6am and out of my apartment before 7am in order to arrive to class on time. and that's not including the ridiculous strike traffic. i rolled out of bed and dreaded the day ahead.
i left around 6:40am and did the zombie walk to the subway. grabbed the subway easily and rode to finch where i just barely made the express bus to school. i made it to school by 7:30am. now i know that i can leave a little later tomorrow when i have to do it all again, and once again on friday. yes, i have 3 8am classes a week. this is not the grad school classes i imagined. hopefully next semester will be better.
it felt strange to be back in the classroom. i looked around and knew nobody. there was a definite age gap in my classmates. where were my TREN girls at? no where. it was depressing. the professor was late so the coordinator took over until he got there. this is when the coordinator told me to switch my one class to the other 8am on friday. i was not happy. class flew by and we didn't do much, similar to most of the first day introductions i've been in before.
i made friends with the two girls next to me who seemed to be remotely my age and i walked with the one over to admissions after class. she had the same problem as me: seneca needed 'proof of degree' from her. admissions opened at 10am and my class got out at 9:50am. the admissions lineup was all the way down the hall and almost around the corner when i got there. seeing as i had really nothing else to do today, i waited. and i waited. and i fucking waited. i waited an hour and 20 minutes to talk to someone. she told me that i needed to send a new transcript and a photocopy of my degree/confirmation of graduation and changed the expiry to the end of september. she told me not to panic. clearly, i was not in panic mode. perhaps i look panicky when i'm awake at 6am.
i headed home shortly after while talking to some of the strike people about their issues and whatnot while waiting for the bus. i like to be informed. the bus at finch going to school when i arrived at finch station had so many people waiting. i was glad to be going the opposite direction. i made it home around 12:30pm with a quick stop in at subway for lunch.
i need a good night's sleep.
Sep 2, 2011
toronto living
i officially live in toronto!
i moved in yesterday. i'm all settled and unpacked. my parents helped me move for most of the day after waiting for an hour for corey to open the door to the apartment. we only had one set of keys -- they were with corey. the movers were not impressed. here is the part where i would post pictures of my place, but alas, i am without a camera. one of the many things that i didn't pack.
i spent last night unwinding and catching up with tyler while waiting for corey to eventually come home, as i was now the sole protector of the coveted keys. i did go get them copied. no more waiting up for late corey anymore!
toronto is a loud city. i found it hard to sleep at night. so many sirens and people talking loudly on the street or apartments below. i hope that i'll be able to get over my light sleeping mode soon. i was up bright and early to get ready for my big day today. i commuted to seneca for the first time and met up with steve. he showed me around, i found the majority of my classes, got my osap and my student card. we grabbed a quick lunch at pizza hut and i commuted back home which took less time for some reason. also, on the subway, i definitely saw a dude that used to be in brock residence back in the day. i never met his eyes but i'm absolutely positive it was him. though i had never had a conversation with him in my residence days, i used to see him around constantly (and let's face it, i was pretty much crushin') -- and now i saw him in toronto. small world.
my parents called to inform me that a letter had arrived from seneca saying that i needed to show proof of my degree, proficiency in english at the college level, and a transcript in order to keep my conditional offer of acceptance. and an expiry of september 8. well, fuck. i don't know what i need to do and nobody seemed to give me a hard time today when i was getting all my shit done on campus. and since it's the long weekend, i won't hear from anyone until possibly tuesday. i'll have to wait in ridiculous lines to talk to somebody on tuesday and get it all sorted out.
it's friday night in toronto and i'm exhausted.
i moved in yesterday. i'm all settled and unpacked. my parents helped me move for most of the day after waiting for an hour for corey to open the door to the apartment. we only had one set of keys -- they were with corey. the movers were not impressed. here is the part where i would post pictures of my place, but alas, i am without a camera. one of the many things that i didn't pack.
i spent last night unwinding and catching up with tyler while waiting for corey to eventually come home, as i was now the sole protector of the coveted keys. i did go get them copied. no more waiting up for late corey anymore!
toronto is a loud city. i found it hard to sleep at night. so many sirens and people talking loudly on the street or apartments below. i hope that i'll be able to get over my light sleeping mode soon. i was up bright and early to get ready for my big day today. i commuted to seneca for the first time and met up with steve. he showed me around, i found the majority of my classes, got my osap and my student card. we grabbed a quick lunch at pizza hut and i commuted back home which took less time for some reason. also, on the subway, i definitely saw a dude that used to be in brock residence back in the day. i never met his eyes but i'm absolutely positive it was him. though i had never had a conversation with him in my residence days, i used to see him around constantly (and let's face it, i was pretty much crushin') -- and now i saw him in toronto. small world.
my parents called to inform me that a letter had arrived from seneca saying that i needed to show proof of my degree, proficiency in english at the college level, and a transcript in order to keep my conditional offer of acceptance. and an expiry of september 8. well, fuck. i don't know what i need to do and nobody seemed to give me a hard time today when i was getting all my shit done on campus. and since it's the long weekend, i won't hear from anyone until possibly tuesday. i'll have to wait in ridiculous lines to talk to somebody on tuesday and get it all sorted out.
it's friday night in toronto and i'm exhausted.
Aug 28, 2011
home stretch
i move to toronto on thursday!
i spent 6 days at embassy last week: sweep, cutlery, cold, hot, more cutlery, more sweep, toast when somebody was sent home.. and so on. the week went by so slowly. but i tried to do something every night.
i saw lots of friends and had some good hangouts. on saturday afternoon, dad and i went to toronto to measure up the new place, see what i need and what can fit, and really just to look at the place since i couldn't remember a whole lot about it! it was just as nice as what i did remember, however. and the majority of my stuff should fit. in typical corey fashion, his room is a disaster and spills into the living room. hopefully that will all change by thursday!
i came back saturday evening to hang with friends and see the dj big chocolate where i was on the guest list. it was a pretty good time. sometimes, i forget how much fun i can have when plans to do things actually happen.
i had today off for recovery -- both from work and the drinking that took place last night. tomorrow, i start back up at embassy for 3 more mornings. i did not give sport chek my availability for this week. after they cancelled my shift the other week and didn't put me on the schedule for last week, i decided that i would just bail. not that they would probably give me shifts anyway!
friends, if you're reading this and we haven't seen each other in days, weeks, months, or years, and you're currently residing in and/or visiting the niagara region in the next 3 days, please get in touch for last minute hangouts.
72 hours remain.
i spent 6 days at embassy last week: sweep, cutlery, cold, hot, more cutlery, more sweep, toast when somebody was sent home.. and so on. the week went by so slowly. but i tried to do something every night.
i saw lots of friends and had some good hangouts. on saturday afternoon, dad and i went to toronto to measure up the new place, see what i need and what can fit, and really just to look at the place since i couldn't remember a whole lot about it! it was just as nice as what i did remember, however. and the majority of my stuff should fit. in typical corey fashion, his room is a disaster and spills into the living room. hopefully that will all change by thursday!
i came back saturday evening to hang with friends and see the dj big chocolate where i was on the guest list. it was a pretty good time. sometimes, i forget how much fun i can have when plans to do things actually happen.
i had today off for recovery -- both from work and the drinking that took place last night. tomorrow, i start back up at embassy for 3 more mornings. i did not give sport chek my availability for this week. after they cancelled my shift the other week and didn't put me on the schedule for last week, i decided that i would just bail. not that they would probably give me shifts anyway!
friends, if you're reading this and we haven't seen each other in days, weeks, months, or years, and you're currently residing in and/or visiting the niagara region in the next 3 days, please get in touch for last minute hangouts.
72 hours remain.
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