sometimes, i forget

hi!

contrary to popular belief, this blog (and i) still exist. i've just been busy. and lazy. mostly just lazy. whatever. here's what's up:

1. progressed onto second semester of year 2 grad school 
yes, i passed first semester with honours grades. i don't know how, but i'm pretty happy about that. in exam week, i had to write 4 papers. that sucked. but i managed to get through it. i could review the semester but i just don't see the point. the semester fucking sucked. it was terrible beyond words, except for 2 classes and 2 profs. making friends with my program classmates was exciting, though. i guess that's sort of why i didn't want to drop the program entirely since everybody ruled.  

second semester is a bit different and seems tougher. i'll figure it out, though. i always do. i have a dick for a prof who seems to be flip flopping back and forth between saying he's not an environmentalist and telling me that he is all about saving the world. i imagine this is only going to get worse for me in the next few weeks as i can't even take the dude seriously and just zone out for the majority of his class. he noticed me zoning out last week and called me out on it. but i snapped back to reality and answered his question. amber: 1, prof: 0 

i'm still hanging out at globe and mail. i actually started the first week back and i think i'll be writing a section of their sustainability report. or something along those lines. i'm not sure they know what they want. but i'm willing to compromise on something that fits. i'm there on mondays. i'm also working on an ecopreneurship business plan focusing on the outsourcing of recyclable toothbrushes in toronto. yeah, sustainability is pretty neat sometimes.

oh, and i also picked up this little number:

graduate certificate in project management - environmental

 and got my sustainability hero, bob willard, to sign his book:

2. holidays!
my holiday break was well needed. i spent some quality time at home for about ten days and hung out with the family and occasionally saw some friends. took a trip to 'merica and smuggled back some shock top raspberry wheat. my brother and i completed the halo 4 campaign. i ate turkey. y'know, usual holiday stuff.

i came back and saw lots of friends that i didn't see too much over the past 2 months since school was crazy busy. i threw a new years eve party and that was fun. corey puked. michelle puked. people got naked. i made out and looked after sick friends. maybe not in that order. y'know, again, usual party stuff. before i knew it, the break was over and i was back at school.

3. dudes/friends/jobs/whatever 
i'm not seeing anyone. it's a strange feeling but it's been this way since november. i actually sort of like it. i've spent a lot of time on myself the past few months and have been very self-reflective on my actions. it's something i probably should have done awhile back but never did. yeah, i'm interested in some dudes but they barely seem to be worth my time to go after, so i just don't.  i'm busy and recently got addicted to halo 4 online multiplayer. that's my new boyfriend -- schooling 9 year olds at halo 4.

friends are cool. i've reconnected with a few that were on their way out. lost a couple but i'm thankful for that. staying clear of dudes for awhile put my true friends in perspective and i was ready to accept that. purged everybody i didn't care about from my facebook and moved on. including, y'know, that dude from before and all his friends. i let go (although, i did a long time ago.. too) but he didn't. i hope he finally got the hint and will just stop trying to contact me.

jobs? fuck that. i guess i'll be restarting my job hunt very soon. i've been looking at openings and applied to a couple. my hopes are not up, though. i'll be re-vamping my resume and all that shit too. the dream is to land a job in 2013. go big or go home, right?

some day soon, i'm sure i'll have something pretty interesting to talk about that's not a general update on the fact that i've been MIA for almost 2 months.

oh, and i added master chief to my halo megablocks collection.

time's a wastin'

i figured the job hunt is getting to a serious desperation point as i applied to several jobs yesterday and received two requests for interviews. one for an administrative position at a daycare and one for a research internship for a marketing firm.

okay, yes... i would prefer the research one. but i'm almost willing to do anything if it pays (so, start looking for my drag king debut sooner rather than later).

i'm basically up in arms about the interview i had this morning. i travelled over half an hour in rush hour commute times to the daycare. i was just under ten minutes early. i walked in and was greeted by a lady to pointed me in the direction of the lady interviewing me. we walked to an office while we attempted small talk. she was sort of difficult to understand and talked pretty fast.

at the office, i had a seat and she asked if i had any experience working with kids. yep, i sure did. then, she asked if i had office experience. yep, i kinda did. working in a library is kinda like an office. there were officey-type things to do and whatnot, so i described to her what i did. she followed up by asking me why she should hire me over others. i threw out some things about how i'm awesome. she didn't seem too impressed with me. she told me that if and when she calls for a second interview is when she would talk about the position, the wage, and answer any questions i had about the position.

i stared at her in disbelief. you mean to tell me i travelled over half an hour to meet with you for exactly five minutes? i asked her if they were looking for somebody full-time, permanent and she shook her head yes. she got up to shake my hand and wished me farewell. she didn't even walk me out. when i had checked the time upon me leaving the daycare, it was 9:30am -- the time my interview was supposed to start.

what the fuck just happened?

the fuck?

not only was this a waste of my time (to barely sleep the night before because of interview nerves, to get up and get ready, to travel across the city and meet her) but also a waste of her own time to meet with me. we both know that's five minutes of our lives we will never get back. so why even bother interviewing if you already seem to know that you don't like me or that i don't fit your qualifications/standards for the position?

ugh. feeling totally down and ridiculous, i walked past a loblaws on the way back to the subway. i dropped off a resume just to try and increase chances of a potential job. maybe something will happen. maybe not. at least my chances are better in dropping that resume off than the interview i just had.

here's hoping that tomorrow's interview on bay street goes a little better.

overqualified

i had an interview with mama earth organics on thursday afternoon.

yeah, i pretty much felt like this.

it was a standard one-on-one interview. he looked over my resume and asked me some questions about it. we talked about my education and previous work experience. but, he questioned whether the job was the right fit for me. as in, my postgrad in project management meant my goals and aspirations to eventually become a project manager were set too high and not applicable to the company.

he basically told me i was overqualified for the position, and also said that they don't want to hire students directly out of school. well, shit. so what employers do hire students from school? he said he would call on friday if he had other questions and to make a decision. there was no call, so i can assume i didn't get it. but my odds are getting better perhaps -- there were 40 applications, narrowed down to 5 people interviewed.

in the meantime, i apply to at least one new job every day. and in the last week, i've received plenty of rejection emails. so, y'know, things are swell on the job search like they always are for me and countless others!

in 11 days, i'll be finished my postgrad and i'll be one happy girl. my program is a complete joke and waste of time. the "internship" (a word i'm going to use extremely loosely here since it's not actually an internship) is not giving me any real world experience. yes, i can create a project based on sponsor requirements, but it doesn't officially help me get anywhere in work experience -- especially when ISO 14001 standards are pretty much obsolete. plus, being in a group with a dude who doesn't do anything isn't helpful either.

the main hope from completing this internship in the beginning was:
a) the possibility of getting a job with the company after completion and
b) using my sponsor as a reference
i definitely won't be doing either of those things. but i'll do a bigger review of the whole program once i'm finished.

look, i've been practicing. i made a pigeon-rat.

also, i'm pretty certain there are pigeons nesting on my balcony. they have woken me up with their noise on several occasions now and i try to scare them away by banging on the window. there's a bunch of leftover garbage from previous tenants on the balcony adjacent from my room that i never cleaned up. and the pigeons have nested on a pile of it. i can't get my door open now because  my parents sealed it shut for me in the winter. the cold draft and the wind blowing open the door sometimes were too much. i need somebody to help me open the door and destroy the pigeon habitat (in a nice, animal rights sort of way).

it's been a couple of weeks since i've seen charles the mouse hanging out in our apartment. i may have accidentally thrown him down the garbage chute one afternoon. i went to empty the garbage and felt something move. early in march, i saw a mouse running around in the laundry room. it seems the whole building must be infested. i hope they stay away with the warm weather now.

risk group project due tomorrow. internship report and presentation wednesday. GIS report wednesday. exams start the next week. risk and business exams on the monday, and civil infrastructure on wednesday, followed by my final GIS presentation and report on the thursday.

11 more days. that's all i need.